"So you do hope for it, despite how much you try to push people away," Huaisang murmurs, tucking that observation away for further consideration. But now the conversation has shifted toward Meng Yao. Huaisang frowns unhappily, gazing off out the window at the darkening sky.

"People did really like him, Jiang-xiong. Or at least they were deceived by him. You have to remember, he had a silver tongue. And most people never suspected him of anything. My job would have been vastly easier if they had. But he was good at making himself seem honorable, and wielding courtesy like a knife. I liked him, and I suspected nothing for years. I'm usually so good at judging a person's character."

Shaking his head to dismiss the topic, Huaisang closes his eyes, pained. "Anyway. My point was only that I don't think all--or even many--will agree with you. My people in Qinghe will, mostly. But as for anyone wanting to court me for reasons other than my position and my wealth? I've spent my life being a failure at nearly every measure of what makes an admirable gentleman. I like myself as I am, but I don't delude myself that many people will ever desire me."