"I ... sort of. Didn't want to know, though, so I tried not to think about it," he admitted, looking at Adam as he sat.

Despite how heavy his heart was, Ronan snorted when Adam asked if it was Gansey and shook his head. "I think everyone has a thing for Gansey at some point. But, no. He's like a brother to me. I think he's making doe eyes some uppity blond now, anyway. Last I heard."

Ronan pressed his lips together again. It felt dishonest to keep his feelings secret from Adam now.

"No... ever since we were kids, I—..."

Gently, he laid his hand on top of Adam's, studying the way their fingers laid together before he forced himself to look away. "Sorry," he mumbled, pulling his hand back, knowing fully well that such actions were over the line. Fingers curling inward, his nails bit into his palm.

"Just. Don't make things easier for me at your own expense. I don't want that. Fuck, Adam. You deserve better than all of this."