marlowemuses | But haven't you heard / hearts turn to dirt

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But haven't you heard / hearts turn to dirt

The war between the Jin Sect and the Nie Sect had gone on for months, a bloody and exhausting battle of attrition. Lan and Jiang had stayed out of it, which was a kind of mercy. Everyone knew that if they took sides, Lan Xichen would support his dearest friend and Jiang Cheng would support his, and it would only spread the bloodshed. Huaisang was grateful that they were left out of this, and yet he often longed for that support and comfort.

Things had only gotten worse when Jin Guangyao had begun bringing in mercenaries. He had coin to spare where Huaisang did not, able to rely upon rich grain fields and a larger populace. Terrain and skill allowed Huaisang’s men to keep them at bay, and yet. It felt like it would only be so long.

The day’s battle had been exhausting and demoralizing in the worst way, a group of mercenaries sent forth to batter at a weakness in Huaisang’s defenses. It had taken mere minutes for Huaisang to spot the strategy, and after hours he still had no solution. The mercenaries were sent on a suicide mission, that was clear, but what was also clear was that they would succeed. They were meant to die and the breach in the border would leave the Nie Sect weak. He would have to fall back inside the very walls of Qinghe. Any peasants left outside would be killed or captured. Any peasants brought inside would starve slowly under siege. It was inevitable.

Huaisang wanted to sob, but he forced himself to think, considering hypotheticals again and again, but it was always the same answer. The walls would breach. They would fall back. They would starve.

He couldn’t change those facts, and that was what delayed him for hours seeing the one thing he could change.

The leader of the mercenary band was the one they called the Scourge. It seemed like he could kill hundreds of men on his own. His blade moved lightning-fast, though he was no cultivator. And he would die like the rest today. That was the only comfort in the tragedy of the day.

All at once, Huaisang saw how to change the pattern.

He sent his orders swiftly, commanding the breach to be surrendered, to fall back sooner, to let the mercenaries live. All that mattered was risking everything on one play which would introduce a new variable.

His men brought their captive in to Qinghe bound in silvery nets of energy. Qinghe was reinforced and the gates had been closed, accepting that awful fate, but Huaisang had a new variable brought to kneel before him in his throne room.

Heart pounding with nerves to be a prey animal facing down such an obvious predator, Huaisang lifted his chin and fanned himself idly, pretending calm in the face of his deadly captive. “So you were the price Jin Guangyao was willing to pay in order to seize my lands.”

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Doul looks up from whatever book he's buried in and, shockingly, almost smiles when he sees Huaisang. Carefully, he tidies away what he's been reading and writing and moves to go sit across from the other man. A meal is welcome, honey wine even more so, but he's not about to risk damaging pages with an incautious flick of sauce.

"I do. So do you, but I think you need no one to tell you that."

Huaisang smiles a tiny bit more at that, sucking briefly at his lower lip and then lifting his cup to sip at his wine instead. "I enjoy indulgences aplenty. As you may have noticed. You still have your library access, as long as you are loyal to me, and in the politics to come I will do what I can to gain access to the Lan library and to insist that you attend me as my 'bodyguards' on those trips. We may also be able to obtain access to many of the relics in Jin Guangyao's private collection. The cultivation world will not want to see those things stay in the hands of someone he raised."

Here he is talking politics when he desired instead to brush all that aside. He shakes his head, reaching for a piece of meat and blushing a bit while he nibbles at it, not sure how to approach the topic he wants to ask.

"I think you'll find that I am quite portable." Doul is content to travel and he knows how to stand about and look either impressive or invisible as the situation requires. Politely, he uncovers the dishes, serving Huaisang and then himself. (He has manners, he just doesn't always choose to use them.)

"If it helps matters, I tend to get to get along well with librarians of all sorts."

"Respect for books will do that," Huaisang agrees, stealing pleased little smiles at him. "But what I am trying to ask, Uther Doul, is whether you desire any reward other than books. I intend to move you into finer accommodations, but it is up to you whether you'd like a house in Qinghe, or lands outside of the city, or a suite in the upper levels of the palace. And... other things. Companionship."

His cheeks are pink and flushed. He takes another nervous sip of his drink.

Doul raises an eyebrow and leans back, looking as if he's considering all the offer.

"I am a simple man and don't care for fine accommodation." A bed is a bed, what more does he need? Fine furnishings and soft fabrics aren't to his taste. "So I would stay close to the library. In the palace, if you'll have it."

"As for the rest, I'd like to hear more about your thoughts on the matter."

"I'll find you something suitable and quiet near the library with good access to the barracks. Though, in Qinghe, most things provide good access to the barracks."

Blushing more and trying not to crumble into a lustful mess, Huaisang reaches for another morsel, nibbling at it as he avoids Doul's gaze. "It depends upon your tastes. If you want a concubine, a mistress, directions to the nearest brothel, a respectable marriage and a place as a general... What sort of companionship pleases you?"

Oh, he's blushing.

"My tastes are varied." Doul's posture relaxes further and he's certainly smiling. Possibly even smug. "But I am not one for marriage. It would be unfair to any woman."

Should he say more? Why not. There is good food, drink, and he feels expansive. "Even though I am far from home, it wouldn't be right. I'm a third son and it's not done."

"I don't understand." Huaisang furrows his brow, earnest in his desire to make Doul happy, and it's made him younger and more innocent in the process, no longer the scheming political and military leader. Still, Doul's reasons for avoiding marriage aren't what Huaisang really wants to know, so he focuses on the more important topic.

"A lover, then? Such things are common among the soldiers in the barracks. As long as differences in rank don't create any unfair compulsion, so if you'd rather a ... fighter like yourself..."

"A lover is best, I find." There's an entertained rumble to his voice when next he speaks. "And I've no interest in compelling anyone to fuck me against their will. It's dull and just gives me a headache."

"Unless this is all a preamble as you work yourself up to asking me to suck your cock."

"Ah!" Huaisang blushes deeply, bringing up his sleeve to hide behind it because he hasn't got his fan out for that purpose. "I wouldn't... I don't..." he mumbles weakly, wanting to reassure that it's not required and he expects nothing.

Draining the cup in his hand from behind the screen of his sleeve, Huaisang sets it down so that he can then hide behind both sleeves. "I find you very attractive, but I don't mean that to be... I don't expect... I don't wish it to make you uncomfortable."

Blinking slowly like a cat in the sun, Doul watches Huaisang and looks throughly pleased with himself and his situation. "Do I look uncomfortable? Do you think I do much of anything I don't care to?"

"If you're unsure that's a different beast, but I have a few ways to test and see if that's the problem. Shall I?"

Peeking shyly over the top of his sleeves, Huaisang keeps his nose covered, watching Doul to make sure he means this.

Nodding agreement, Huaisang lowers his sleeves a little farther, breath coming in quick little gasps of anxious anticipation. He bites down on his lower lip, then suckles on it to soothe the sting, eyes never leaving Doul's face.

Still kneeling by the table, Doul leans back further and spreads his legs a little wider. It's not an easy position to hold, but comfort isn't the point with this display. Breathing out steadily, he keeps watching Huaisang as he starts to almost absently palm his cock through his trousers.

"What sort of companionship pleases you?"

Huaisang's eyes slide down with the movement of that hand, licking his lips again with desire. "I'm drawn to physically powerful men. I like being manhandled. Picked up or pinned down."

Moving forward, he kneels between those spread legs, leaning in and tilting his chin up to steal a kiss.

"And you're the right size for it. The thought of my hands around your wrists, or your waist, it --" And given that he returns the kiss, there's not really all that much more he needs to say. He doesn't push beyond what he's offered, but will meet it eagerly.

"Have you thought about me having you against a wall?"

Huaisang makes a soft keening noise at those suggestions, but then gets lost in the kiss, sweet and yearning. His hands slide around Doul's shoulders, holding him close, and he scoots a little closer, his own thighs pressing softly against the inside of Doul's spread thighs.

Breathless as the kiss breaks for a moment, he grins wide, no longer shy now that he knows Doul desires him. "I've thought about it. I want it. Fuck me, please. Please, Uther Doul."

"Here?" He's not opposed to getting into Huaisang's robes in the library, but it's not going to be the most comfortable place for it. "I'm happy to get knocked around, but I wouldn't want to bruise you against the floor."

Doul can lean back and easily support his weight on one arm, leaving the other free to skate up and down Huaisang's back.

"There are cushions," Huaisang says, shivering with pleasure as those fingers wander up and down his back. His eyes close blissfully, body trembling at the exquisite ticklishness of it. "Rugs. Couches. You just have to pick a good spot."

Smiling invitingly as he enjoys the light embrace, Huaisang brushes the tip of his nose against Doul's, sweetly flirtatious. "I thought you were going to start with ravishing me against a wall."

"Spoiled for choice." With one hand, Doul cradles the back of Huaisang's head as he pushes up and stands. It's not graceful, but he's strong enough that it doesn't really matter.

"I think you'll look best if I fuck between your thighs and then suck you off." They don't need to strip down too much, it's quick, and when done well, it's very, very good.

"Sounds like a good place to start," Huaisang agrees, flirtatiously ensuring that there will be more after that 'start'. He leans into Doul as he's lifted, helping to make his weight easier to lift, and gives him a beaming smile once they're both up. "I'm impatient. I want you. I've wanted you since that first moment you were before me, feral and chained."

"Feral? Does that mean you've tamed me or just bent me enough to take a bridle?" No answer is needed as he leans into a kiss and walks them both back towards a nicely sturdy wall, free from windows or loose scrolls. He wants to get off, but not if it risks the works available.

"May I?" He wants to undo the ties that hold their clothing shut. Skin, he very much wants to see more of Huaisang.

"Just enough to take a bridle," Huaisang confirms with a little purr in his voice, then presses a few more kisses along Doul's jawline as he's carried. "I find feral very attractive, but I do like to know that I won't be bitten. Well... feel free to bite. You may even leave marks on me, if you like. Just no blood, understand?"

Rumbling happily as he's pinned between Doul and the wall, Huaisang nods permission at once, pointing to the first tie to be undone on his complicated robes, then indicating the next. His people understand discretion and are familiar with Huaisang's whims. They won't be disturbed.

"I understand." There's a shiver of something when he's told that he's attractive and whether he's reacting to being called feral or the mention of a bridle, that's up to Huaisang to decide. Either way, Doul tugs open the ties as he balances his need to see more skin and to respect the quality of the garments.

His hands are calloused and rough from sword practice, but there are also marks and faded ink spatters from writing late into the night. It makes for a fine contrast.

Huaisang shrugs his garments aside easily, letting layer by layer slip away. He loves being watched in this way. For so much of his life he tries to avoid direct scrutiny, but in private he loves having the focused attention of a desired person. It's been a long time since he trusted anyone in his bed. Even though he's not sure that he can truly trust Doul, he desires him. That's enough.

His own hands dart over Doul's clothing, greedily tugging at straps and fastenings, demanding access to the bare skin beneath. "I want you."

"Then I'd best help you." He wears fewer layers, but the ties and stays of his own clothing are tricky and not common in the middle kingdom. Doul tugs at a couple of toggles and shucks bits of leather and fabric, letting them drop behind him.

The skin that's revealed is scarred and marked from years of fighting. A couple of blue-black fantastical animal figures are tattooed over his chest and one thigh. One is missing a leg, the ink cut off by a larger, longer, looping and very old wound. A little bit higher, a little more to the center, and he'd have a very difficult time with what comes next.

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