marlowemuses | Everything I got, I got working for me

Entry tags:

Everything I got, I got working for me

As she rapped her knuckles against the hotel room door and leaned against the door frame, using her 5'11" height to loom, Satoru felt jubilant with success even though this tour hadn't officially started.

It had taken months of planning already, and Satoru itched with impatience. When she'd first announced a joint tour with Suguru, Satoru already had the plan drafted with her own media team, but they'd mentioned nothing to Suguru's team, only sending over the proposal after Satoru had made an informal teaser announcement about it. She'd half expected that Suguru would refuse the dare and call it out as the prank that it absolutely was (at which point Satoru would be able to make a stink about Suguru being a coward and backing out of an agreement). So she'd been thrilled that Suguru had agreed to the tour.

They'd share the stage--there was simply no other reasonable way to do it. Swapping off songs, providing support vocals, even featuring a few duets. It was a highly unusual arrangement, but that had helped to blow up the publicity around the tour, which had sold out within hours, immediately creating clamor to have more dates added and a social media frenzy of fans thrilled or enraged about the situation.

They'd arrived at the hotel and their first show was tomorrow night, but aside from some agreed-upon arrangements and a set list, negotiated and exchanged through their respective teams, they'd done nothing to prepare for performing together. Satoru wasn't worried about it. She knew every one of Suguru's songs. She'd written the arrangements herself that she'd sent over to propose which ones she wanted to cover with support vocals. Even though she'd never been to any of Suguru's shows, she'd seen recordings of them. As much as Satoru wanted to spend the next three months irritating the shit out of Suguru, she also wanted to uncompromisingly create good music and put on an incredible performance that their fans would be talking about for the rest of their lives. And she knew she could rely on Suguru to do the same.

Finally, though, they'd arrived at the same hotel, and finally Satoru could be face to face again with her best enemy.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Suguru squeals when Satoru twists her nipple, jerking back away from her former friend and rubbing her nipple. "What the fuck, Satoru, are you a child?" she bursts out. "Still incapable of being anywhere close to mature, I see."

Her voice is maybe a little high. A little breathless. Her cunt certainly isn't wet and clenching around nothing.

She wasn't wearing a bra, and her nipples had always been sensitive, not that Satoru knew that.

"I have actual friends, not people I pay to hang out with me or people who want to mooch off my fame. Pity you'll never understand that." She doesn't know if Satoru hears her before the door slams closed. Suguru doesn't care. She's fuming over it, and grabs her phone. She has Satoru's contact information now, and she finds an old picture of her, Manami, Miguel and Larue in a karaoke booth, posing together to send to Satoru. Suguru obviously looks younger, so she can't even accuse Suguru of staging it.

After sending it off, she tosses down her phone, and then throws herself on her bed, digging in her nightstand for the vibrator she usually carries. It's an unsatisfying orgasm, Suguru too impatient to take her time on getting off the first time, but her breasts are aching and her cunt throbbing with repressed arousal.

Seeing Satoru in person after all these years made Suguru intensely aware of the desire she still harbored for Satoru. No one had made her burn quite the same way, no one made her very bones ache. At least it was only desire, which Suguru was good at dealing with, channeling all that passion into her music, and they wouldn't be alone often, so it wasn't like she was going to have opportunities to act on any impulses she had.

She showered after her rather disappointing orgasm, and crawled into bed, doing her best to forget about Satoru and everything they'd talked about, only to be plagued by restless dreams all night, waking up once with her fingers down her panties and Satoru's name on her lips. She hadn't even done that as a teenager, and felt mortified when she realized what she was doing. Rather than attempting to sleep again, she found her way to the hotel gym, working out some of her stress on the elliptical and weights until she needed to be up for the day.

Of course, she couldn't escape Satoru and her team completely, since they were putting on a show together, but she did make her way to the venue earlier than she needed to, simply so she wouldn't see Satoru alone again.

When they'd been teenagers, Satoru had dated constantly. It was almost always arranged in some way, almost always a PR stunt. The agency offered up the prettiest boys from acting and pop and made them seem like trophies. If they hadn't acted like trophies, hadn't doted on her properly, Satoru had dumped them promptly. But some of them lasted for a few weeks.

Satoru was always horny, but making out was boring, and she wasn't really interested in doing anything more than that, so she just kind of accepted that was how things were. She always wanted sex, but whenever she had the prospect of doing that with someone, it wasn't appealing. So she just decoupled her desire from herself. When she got herself off, her fantasies were abstract things--walking along a beautiful beach alone--or externalized--characters in some book or movie that she liked. Occasionally she thought about Suguru, but that was usually when they'd quarreled or done something adrenaline-packed together, so it was only that her blood was high. It wasn't like she was thinking about doing things with Suguru. It was just the thrill of the trouble they'd gotten into together.

As an adult, with more control over her own life, she'd dated more exclusively. Testing out what she liked and never finding it. The relationships that lasted a few months were with other musicians, usually older men, and always as something that started as collaboration. A conversation about music, a jam session, a few nights together. Satoru kept the collaborations, had given a few of them places on her albums.

So she thought nothing of it when she went back to her room and masturbated to the thought of Suguru crawling over her like that. It was just the thrill of the challenge that excited her. That was all.

In the morning, Satoru showed up at the venue in high-waisted leggings and a crop top that kept falling off one shoulder. She was still showing about six inches of midriff, but now it was a higher section from her waist to the band of her black sports bra, visible in flashes every time she moved because the crop top was so short. In the bright daytime sunlight of the venue, she had on her black blindfold to take away most of that glare, though that did mean she had to keep Ijichi closer at hand to help make up for the loss of details and her peripheral vision.

Heading straight over to Suguru once she spotted her, Satoru smacked a sheaf of papers against her rival's chest. "Look that over," she ordered, intending to stand there and loom until she complied.

The arrangement she'd written for Suguru's song was like a single part for two voices, layered like a madrigal, rather than the logical two parts of a traditional duet. On the harmonies where they sang together, the two voices wove in and out, neither one possessing the melody alone. If the two parts were recorded separately, they'd both be discordant. In the sections where only one of them sang, Satoru had slightly modified some of the lyrics to make the two parts diverge.

Suguru's original song had been about yearning and regret, but the modified version created the first impression of a woman in conflict with herself over whether to leave a lover. But there was also the sense of a narrative of two lovers separating, reconnecting--unable to truly come together and unable to fully break apart.

When Satoru had suggested that maybe she'd do this as a cover of Suguru's song, she'd already known that she'd need Suguru to record it with her. No one else could do it. Handling the counterintuitive melody-harmony interplay of the voices required either exceptional technical skill (Suguru) or the kind of genius who could comprehend that level of musical complexity (Satoru). But more importantly, it required two singers with rare synergy, both to keep them in sync and to keep the tension between the two voices.

The whole thing was a display of mad genius, and Satoru wasn't sure that it would work, even if Suguru committed to trying it. Suguru's song was something special, strong enough to carry the weight of what Satoru had done to it, and Satoru knew that if it did work, the result would be transcendent.

Back when they had been teenagers, in the group together, Suguru had realized one bright, vivid afternoon that she loved Satoru. She still remembers the day, and everything they had been doing, the clothes they were wearing. They had a rare afternoon break, and she and Satoru had gone to a movie, and the sun had been too bright for Satoru when they emerged, and Suguru laid in a cool, dark room with her best friend. She had curled up, facing Satoru as they chatted, and Suguru's heart beat so strongly against her ribs that it felt like they might break as the realization hit her. "Oh," she thought, carefully touching her fingers to Satoru's, who looked at her with a smile like the dawn, "I love her."

In the years since, she had done her best to get over it. Satoru was never going to love her like that, which was fine when they were friends, and then Satoru wasn't even her friend. Any good will and friendliness between them was shattered with Suguru walking out, especially the way she did, carefully and deliberately burning every single bridge she had behind her. She forged her own path, found people who supported her and believed her and even liked her. Found girlfriends, although none of her relationships lasted longer than six months or so. Found out what she liked. Found people who loved her, and who she loved in return.

Which is why, when she sees Satoru that day, all long, lean limbs and midriff on display, it's only the aggravating frustration and latent, unresolved desire from her youth that leaves her mouth dry and her heart beating painfully in her chest. The leggings and crop top look suited her, and Satoru was an objectively gorgeous woman. Suguru was gay; admiring beautiful women was a thing. It didn't mean anything more than that.

Idly, Suguru realized she was going to have to step up her pre-show look, if this was what Satoru was going to be coming in with. Suguru appreciated her comfort before shows, usually wearing comfortable sweats or leggings and loose t-shirts that let her move around easily, her hair usually in a messy bun to style later. But if Satoru was showing up in things that showed off skin like that, model perfect, then Suguru couldn't bring less than her best.

This tour was going to be a nightmare.

When Satoru hands her the papers, Suguru takes them and turns away, rolling her eyes when Satoru keeps looming. Less than two inches between them and of course Satoru acted like she was a giant.

"Fine," she snaps, and sits back to read over the arrangement. She doesn't expect much, since Satoru had been so adamant that the song was boring, acting like it was nothing to her to make a few changes. Despite herself, Suguru still admires Satoru's talent and musical abilities, and the experimental nature of her music even if she wishes Satoru would do something more honest. And this is stunning, in a way that Suguru didn't expect and isn't quite sure what to do with now that it's been presented to her. It's a beautiful song, taken to new heights with Satoru's input.

"I see you're capable of understanding emotions," Suguru says, overly sweet, once she finishes reading the thing through twice. "I didn't think you had it in you, Satoru." Which was perhaps the biggest lie Suguru's said so far; she was one of the people who could see beneath Satoru's exterior and see the emotions in her, and the depth. "I need to hear it with both our voices."

Satoru just ignores the jabs. They're fairly weak ones, anyway, nothing interesting enough to respond to. The music is far more interesting, and Satoru's electrified with it. She loves music no matter what, but she also loves challenges and puzzles, something difficult enough to be interesting. This is something exceptional, and she wants so much for it to work, and only Suguru can make that happen with her.

"I know," Satoru says, a bounce of eagerness in her voice, like an energetic puppy. "I do, too. It's not exactly something I could test out on my own." She hears it in her head, but there's always a blurring effect with imagination. The mind simply elides over things that are missing or incongruent. It works in her head, but that doesn't mean it'll work in person.

She doubts they're going to rehearse the whole show. They both know the songs and arrangements, and there's a certain element of improvisation that Satoru wants. She expects that Suguru feels the same. It would have been an easy, obvious thing to demand an extra day or three of rehearsal so they could run through the show together. Neither of them do choreography--they're both too focused on the music for that--and while there are lights and effects, those change from stage to stage and are easy to learn in the pre-show run through and setup. So they hadn't needed to coordinate anything other than the music, and Satoru is pretty sure that they're both preparing for that like a duel rather than a dance. Their music is going to be something alive, something flashing back and forth between them, rather than something rehearsed.

But this has to be rehearsed. The life in it during the performance will be the tension between them, the energy of keeping their voices entwined, something vibrant and real. In order to do that, they have to already know the push and pull of the piece, and the interplay of what Satoru created. Satoru knows both parts, and she'd given Suguru a little more of the lead (it's her song, at heart), and herself a few more of the discordant beats, the stranger and more challenging part. The two parts aren't marked, but Satoru knows Suguru will be able to see which one was crafted for her voice.

Following after Suguru, Satoru lets her take control of what accompaniment she wants for this, how she wants to run through it. Satoru just waits, vibrating with anticipation until she can sing.

Suguru can be professional about this. She cares about the music more than she cares about getting jabs in, and more than she cares about seeing Satoru excited and eager over something. She owes it to her fans to bring them something they'll enjoy.

"Let's find Miguel," she says, and heads off in the labyrinth of the backstage rooms and staging areas to find her lead guitarist. Suguru knows how to play guitar and piano, and has done so on stage, but she always has her backing band with her. Any of the musicians with them could play the song but he'd be the best at understanding what was going on with the music and the intent woven into the lyrics and the music. The song is strong enough not to need much else, although that might change with a run through.

She grabs a roadie on the way, letting him know to set up two microphones on stage for a quick rehearsal. While he runs off to do that, Suguru finds her guitarist and passes him the notes. They talk it over for a minute, Suguru pulling Satoru in for any technical questions he has, and then they're on stage.

Most of their staging has them on opposite sides of the stage, with the occasional crossover or stepping back while the other person is in the limelight. But this one— with this one, they need to be closer. It's not a song they're singing at the audience, facing the crowd, especially this initial try.

The song is an impressive blend of Suguru's style and Satoru's experimental nature, neither one taking center stage, but blending beautifully. Intimate, almost, especially given the lyrics. It needs an intimate setting. She pulls the mic stands closer together, and while she doesn't expect they'll be tied to the placement, it's a start. Miguel off to the side, and the two of them center stage. A spotlight on them, perhaps, leaving the rest of the stage dark— fitting for a reveal of a new song, one now a duet between the two of them.

But those are details for later. Now, she turns to the mics, gesturing to Satoru to take the other one, and puts the notes on the music stand, just in case they need anything. Despite the lyric changes, she still knows the song.

She gestures to Miguel, and the opening chords fill the stage.

Satoru's never done a song like this before, and she's anxious about whether it will work, whether she can pull it off. If it fails and Suguru is shitty about it, the vulnerability of that will gut her. If Suguru had just said no, too weird, too much of a change to the original song, that would have been fine. But if it fails.

Bouncing a little in place, energy as restless as ever, Satoru lets all that energy settle into tense readiness as she steps up to the mic. She's glad that Suguru starts, that the first couple of lines are unchanged. It would be too hard to start that blending from the first words. They need to lead up to it, lead into it. One melody, then add the harmony for a couple of lines, and then everything twists.

Her adrenaline feels supercharged as they run through the song, with Suguru matching her and keeping up with her, like a game, a puzzle--this performance they can only do together. There are a few mistakes from what she'd intended, a few discordant moments where it doesn't work, but those are minor fixes. The concept is solid.

As soon as the song finishes, Satoru's reaching for the notes, marking an adjustment and asking Suguru's input on another, workshopping it and then running through it again. They're drawing a crowd now, aides and stadium employees stopping their other tasks in order to come and stare, and there's applause at the end of the second run-through. Satoru lifts a sheepish hand in appreciation and thanks, preferring to minimize it rather than bask in it as she would for a performance. Right now she just wants to keep working, talking through another set of tiny adjustments. "I want to run through it at least once more with the full accompaniment, once things are more set up on stage."

The song works, and it is better than what she'd started with, something unique for both of them. Suguru rarely collaborated with other musicians; duets were even more rare, and the few she had were not as daring and interesting as this.

Suguru's the one to wave to the group surrounding them, grinning at them. She knew a number of the aides, since they were her people, and some of the stadium employees from previous events, and liked that they did feel they could stop and listen.

"Thank you, everyone. We'll perform this one as a run-through later so you get a chance to hear it before anyone else. Don't spoil the surprise!" she says, loudly enough for everyone to hear. Her voice carries well, and she's always polite when dealing with the staff. "For now, we'll get out of your way. " They could practice elsewhere, especially since there were notes she wanted to discuss with Satoru.

She passes her staging notes to the manager and heads backstage, grabbing Satoru's wrist to pull her back into the green room. They weren't sharing dressing rooms, which would be too much, but this was open to both.

"The lyrics here&mdash" Suguru says, pointing to two lines. "They're too weak. We need more impact. Something that shows how torn she's feeling. Her heart is broken, and she knows she needs to leave, but it's tearing her apart." She pauses, then reaches for her phone, scrolling through her notes until she reaches something. Her forehead wrinkles, deep in concentration as she mouths a few words, and then she scribbles a few lines down, handing it back to Satoru. "How about this? And what do you think about accompaniment? I liked the guitar with it but I think it needs piano too. Drums, the original had a bass line that I think would still work with this."

She's careful to close her notes app and lock the screen after that, not wanting anyone else to see anything.

Satoru's eyes linger a little on how Suguru deals with their people. It's smoothly done, better than Satoru's handling, and Satoru hasn't gotten to see quite this side of her, matured from the people skills she had as a teen. Satoru's better with the showy PR of public events. Even though she's good to her people and they like her, she's a little jealous of Suguru's ease at it. Her ... kindness.

She'd forgotten Suguru could be so kind. She'd used to think Suguru was the kindest person she knew. After Suguru had left, none of them thought of her as kind anymore.

Surprised when Suguru drags her off like that, Satoru follows without argument, blinking but quiet as Suguru pulls her into the green room and chatters away, but then she falls into workshopping it easily. "Bass, definitely. Keyboard. Use my keyboardist, let her put just a little bit of synth in there. Not too much, I promise. But I want to lay just a little bit of awe in there. People are going to realize that something incredible is happening, but we want to emphasize that and have them feel it viscerally, too. Little bit of a thrill." Satoru raps her knuckles lightly against Suguru's belly to indicate 'feel it there'. "Can't believe I'm gonna have to stand next to you at the Grammys. Gross."

"Synth," Suguru says, considering that option. "We'll try it on the run-through, but I think I see it." And she trusts Satoru to know her music, and this isn't something Satoru is going to sabotage, if she's talking about Grammy's.

She sucks in her breath when Satoru raps her knuckles against her stomach, going still. Satoru was always so touchy, so clingy, and Suguru had forgotten that. It doesn't bode well for her that just such a simple touch makes her break out in goosebumps.

She pulls her hair out of the bun, the silky strands falling to her waist as she shakes them out. She steps in closer to Satoru, smirking up at her.

"I'll be the best company you could have on stage," she says. "Better than anyone else you've shared it with so far. Or you could share it with in the future." She might not have Satoru's stunning fame, but she's no slouch. "Don't forget, you're sharing a stage with me now. The Grammy's won't be any worse."

She pats Satoru's cheek and blows her a kiss.

"Be back in a few hours."

Satoru's lips part and she blinks in surprise as Suguru steps close. Suguru's just ... so pretty? And she was never flirty like this before. Satoru doesn't know what's going on. Teenage Suguru was always such a good girl. And sure, she'd been closeted at the time, so that probably had put something of a damper on her flirtations, but still.

It's supposed to be Satoru ruffling Suguru's feathers, not the other way around. And she's not even sure why Suguru thinks that's going to work? Because she's gay? But Satoru's pan, so why would she be bothered by ... wait, does Suguru even know she's pan? Satoru talks about it occasionally in interviews and has referenced it in some songs, but she's only ever made out with girls, never actually dated one. Even so, why would she be bothered by Suguru flirting? Satoru was always the handsy one, without boundaries, when they were young.

"Wait, where are you going?" Satoru calls after her, though without any great confidence that Suguru will hear or care about the question.

She kinda wants to go after her. She really wants to put her hands in Suguru's hair. She misses playing with it.

Instead, Satoru goes back out to work on learning the stage, and how they're setting up the blocking and effects and everything else she has to check on before she goes into hair and makeup.

Suguru doesn't answer. Instead, she waves her fingers over her shoulder in goodbye. She's not going anywhere specific; she just needed to escape from Satoru and Satoru's everything. She needed some breathing room. Sometimes she wants to punch her. Sometimes she wants to kiss her stupid. Sometimes she wants both. It's too many emotions for the short time she's been in Satoru's presence.

Besides, she needs to hunt down her band members and Satoru's keyboardist, handing them music for the song, requesting they show up for the soundcheck and pre-show run-through. (She knows they'll be there, but confirming never hurts.) Satoru's keyboardist is skittish with her, eyeing her warily, and Suguru has to repress a sigh. She burned her bridges when she left, and she doesn't regret that, but half the people she worked with and so many of her new people seem to think Suguru is some demon lady straight from hell.

She disappears into her dressing room and meditates a little, has lunch, goes through her notes a few more times. And then, unsure where Satoru is but unwilling to let her trepidation get in her way, Suguru finds her way to the stage to study the blocking. They'll run through it, of course, and she has studied the layout and instructions, but seeing it live vs on paper is different.

Of course, Satoru is there. Still with her blindfold on and Ijichi next to her. If Suguru were mean, she could surprise her and spook her. But she dismisses the idea immediately, not liking the idea of using Satoru's vision problems against her. So she walks over, making some noise and making sure Ijichi can see her.

"Do you want to rehearse that song before hair and makeup or after?" she asks.

"Before," Satoru answers, alertness immediately switching back to the topic of that song. She wants to make sure it's as good as it can possibly be. "Hair and makeup can still be happening while the opening band is playing, no problem." The opening band is one Satoru picked--she likes choosing local bands, female-led, high energy and experimental. It's fun, getting to find local talent and give them a boost, and maybe even to collaborate a bit with them if she has the chance. Keeps her fresh and lets her mentor younger musicians. She's found she likes mentoring.

They run through it with the full accompaniment, then Satoru goes to her keyboardist for notes, workshopping the things that the keyboardist tried which she really liked, and then demonstrating a couple of things that Satoru thinks could work. She's flirty and familiar when she does this, having no problem being in the other woman's space, and they collaborate well together. Satoru doesn't like the idea of hooking up with band members, but if she had to pick a girl ... their energy is good together, and the collaboration is there, which is what Satoru seems to need most in anything more than a one night stand (and even, usually, as part of her one night stands). The primary thing that holds her back, aside from her policy on dating band members, is that her relationship with the other woman has a little too much mentorship in it. Few things are more of a turnoff--Satoru never sleeps with groupies or fledgling musicians who idolize her. Even if it's just a makeout session, Satoru needs to feel like there's some equality in the situation. The more that someone matches her energy, challenges her, pushes back against her ...

They run through the song again. Satoru can feel the power in it, this thing they've created. She wonders if Suguru understands that she wouldn't have been able to create this off of just any song. Even aside from the fact that she'd never be able to perform this with anyone else.

"I want it fairly late in the set list," Satoru says, after they've run through it again. They're nailing the harmonies the way Satoru envisioned them, though she feels like she's not quite keeping up with the emotion that Suguru's bringing to this. The best Satoru can do is follow her lead on which emotions to emphasize in which sections of the song, and to give that everything she's got. "Even though it's relatively soft and slow for something late in the show, the charge on it is intense. I want a lot of energy built up already, and they need to have already experienced us interacting on other duets, so that they already know what we can do and it stands out even more that this is something really special."

The first run-through is fine. The keyboardist is good, and Suguru secretly likes what she brings. She doesn't go over to talk to her with Satoru; instead, she talks to her band about it, making a few adjustments here and there in the music. They should be talking about it as a group, rather than so siloed like this, but Suguru is still wary around Satoru's people—

Though wary is the wrong word. Not that she would admit it, but jealousy burns in her as she watches them talk, the energy between them. Suguru has that with her band members, and she knows, logically, that's what Satoru looks for in musicians (she's mentioned it in interviews that Suguru watches late at night, after drinking, and her defences are down). So it shouldn't be a problem. But they have an easy camaraderie that Suguru and Satoru once had, and now there's just animosity and troubled waters. Suguru wasn't wrong with what she said about being the best Satoru's ever shared the stage with, but it doesn't feel like it's anything special now.

But she can't think about any of that now. She has to keep cool and composed, especially for opening night, and Suguru refuses to let Satoru get to her. She's spent a decade rebuilding everything she lost, and it won't slip out of her hands at the height of her fame just because Satoru wants to prove something.

So she throws herself into the song when Satoru rejoins her, bringing out more emotion than she intends. But it works for the music. Something proud and cruel in Suguru delights when she realizes that Satoru is mostly following her lead on the emotional aspect. She's never been jealous of Satoru's talent, because Satoru's always been as bright as the sun, as all encompassing as the heat of a summer day. It was stupid to be jealous of that, especially when Suguru was wrapped up in her, had her attention and knew the troubles behind that talent. Still, knowing there is something Satoru isn't quite unparalleled at and that Suguru succeeds in feels like an accomplishment.

"Later on...." Suguru flips her set list. "After Infinity. It's the brightest song, we need something to bring everyone back before I transition into Dreamer." She makes a little frown, thinking about that. "Maybe not. They're a little too close in theme to be distinct, and I want this song to stand out."

Satoru comes over and leans her arm on Suguru's shoulder as she looks over the set list with her, playfully using her as furniture. It's the sort of easy contact she would have initiated all the time back when they were teenagers. Right now, with both of them genuinely working on preparing the song and the show, Satoru's forgotten her spite, forgotten that she'd started this all to find ways to make Suguru miserable. This just feels natural and right, the two of them working as seamlessly as ever.

When they've done their best on the song for now (and no doubt they'll polish it for the album version, whenever that happens), they break to do their final prep backstage, getting into hair and makeup and putting on costumes. Satoru's got a couple of costume changes throughout the show, and it's nice to have the buffer of Suguru's songs in order to do that, instead of having the much faster fifteen-second quick changes she's used to doing between songs.

The stage is split visually, all black on Suguru's side and bright white on Satoru's side. Yin and yang. One of the visual effects artists has put together a theme of two betta fish, black and white, swirling past each other on the screens at different points of the show.

Satoru's costumes are all white as well, the first one basically just a rhinestone bra along with low-slung pants, and high-heeled boots to accentuate her height, making her statuesque. The intro starts for her first song as the trap door lifts her up from beneath the stage, power stance ready and mic in her hand, challenging smirk on her lips as she launches into the song. Suguru comes in partway through, like she's 'crashing' the song, set up as a song duel that they'd only lightly rehearsed so it would have the best improv energy, which works when Satoru starts laughing at one point and Suguru has to finish the verse.

"Geto Suguru, everyone," Satoru says, as the song finishes, with a wave of her hand that manages to both display and dismiss Suguru. There's an immediate roar of approval from Suguru's fans, and mixed boos and cheers from Satoru's. "I was charitable enough to let her come on tour with me, so don't be too mean to her, okay? That's my job."

Suguru doesn't go stiff under her arm, but it's a close thing. There's the distraction of the set list to help keep her distracted, and she loosens over time. At least in this, she doesn't expect Satoru to be too mean or too unprofessional.

When Suguru left the group and started performing on her own, she rarely showed off any skin. It would have helped to be sexy and slutty on stage or in photos, gotten her more attention, but she wanted to distance herself from her pop days. She wore all black, heavy jeans and long shirts and chunky boots. While her style has changed over the years, incorporating more color, more revealing and showy pieces, she's returned to solid black for this tour. When she emerges on stage, she's in black jeans and chunky, stappy black boots with all black fittings, and a fitted black top with a corset over that— a heavy contrast to Satoru's clothing, which was part of the intent. Her hair hangs down her back in her usual half-up, half-down style.

"She wants me here," Suguru says, as soon as the crowd settles down. "Don't let her fool you." More laughter and cheers from her fans, and mixed reactions from Satoru's. "She needs someone to keep her on her toes. She's getting up there in age."

Suguru is 58 days younger than Satoru. Suguru isn't generally that immature, but it's sometimes fun teasing her about that.

Suguru winks at the crowd and launches into the next song, one of hers.

The whole show is a high like Satoru's never felt before. She loves working the crowd, keeping their energy up, and she loves the challenge of pitting herself against Suguru. On the songs where she's serving as support, she does it genuinely, showing off what she can do specifically by using her skill to make Suguru shine, because she is here to make sure that it's the best show it can be. Most of their duets she treats as duels, trying to outdo Suguru in skill or energy, and she throws plenty of curve balls during Suguru's solo songs, slipping in a playful interruption or stealing a couple lines, but always with very careful attention to keeping the energy playfully competitive, never mean and never doing anything to sabotage a performance, just a constant mischievous effort to steal a little more than her share of the spotlight and to draw laughter from the audience.

The only duet she doesn't treat as a duel is Contact, because that belongs to them both now, and it's the only time where she intentionally pulls back a little, letting more of the focus fall on Suguru and letting her carry a little more of the strength of the song.

The curveballs Satoru throws her way are things Suguru expects. Had been expecting this entire time. Satoru is professional enough that she won't fuck everything up, Suguru knows, but she thrives on challenge. Suguru went into this knowing that, expecting that, and doing her best to rise to the challenge. No one's ever challenged her like Satoru, which is fine, and not something she needs, but it's a thrill to have that drive back. Suguru isn't as pointed about interruptions or stealing lines, and doesn't often push back when she has a line stolen; Suguru's never cared much about the spotlight and understands better than most people the performance aspect of shows. And she knows how Satoru thrives on the attention, the spotlight, the thrill of everything, and she's happy to let that happen. It makes some of the performance easier, in fact.

There's always an energy present in her shows, she'd never not deliver that, but sharing the stage with Satoru is vastly different, and she feeds off the energy the same way Satoru's fans do. Neither of them slow down.

The first performance of Contact is emotional. More emotional than Suguru expected, even after running through it with Satoru, and she feels strangely vulnerable on stage while singing it. They switched sides for it, Satoru in her all white against Suguru's black stage. Suguru sings her heart out, looking at Satoru, and it occurs to her that Satoru doesn't know the song is about her, and the melancholy she feels is evident in her voice.

The rest of the concert goes off smoothly, the two coming back out for encores, to the delight of their fans, a song each and a final duet, and to Suguru it feels like she's in a daze, the adrenaline still pumping through her veins after.

Satoru's buzzing with energy by the end of the show. She always gets worked up on stage, the high of it better than any drug. (She'd tried some drugs, back in her teens, and hated it. Her emotions were already too much, most of the time, and her energy was already so high, that uppers only made her paranoid and manic, and downers--including alcohol--numbed her brain and made her illogical in a way that she hated. It had been the one way in which Satoru had been the boring one: she had been vigilantly sober after needing only a very tiny handful of experiences to convince her that no, the first miserable experience had not been a fluke.)

But this, a challenge like she's never had before, the energy and skill that Suguru brings, the intensity of performing with her. It's so many of the best parts of performing with Suguru from back then, and this time--finally--it's their music, their creative freedom.

Satoru's so wet by the end of it, she's genuinely worried she's going to start soaking through her tight little hot pants. Her skin is tingling and she's so worked up that she's pretty sure she's going to go masturbate for a couple of hours before she can get even half of this out of her system. As the two of them stumble backstage after the show, Satoru feels feral, barely human, and she only just keeps that cheery onstage persona up until the darkness of the hallway closes around them. There's only the turn of a corner and a few steps in that little access hallway to keep the bright light of backstage separated from the carefully crafted environment of the stage. On the other side of that door, they'll be swamped by aides offering water, candy, a change of clothes, everything that Satoru needs after a concert. But she can't even make it that far.

As soon as they're around the curve of the curtain wall separating them from the stage, Satoru shoves Suguru up against the wall, crowding into her space with a growl that turns into a whine at the end. She's quivering with energy and overstimulation, and there's not a single logical thought in her mind as she drops her head to Suguru's shoulder and bites.

It's not enough to break skin, but Satoru's too hyped up to restrain herself, and there's absolutely going to be a huge and vivid bruise there later for Suguru to explain away. ("Yeah, my co-star assaulted me like a feral raccoon.")

When Satoru grabs her and pushes her against that wall, Suguru is sure she's going to start something. Say something rude and demeaning and try to get under Suguru's skin. She doesn't expect anything that actually happens.

The bite hurts in exactly the way Suguru likes things to hurt, and she moans. She's still running on the energy from the show, arousal high, and she desires Satoru in her very bones, and now? Saoru pressed against her, biting her like that?

She slides fingers into Satoru's hair, yanking her head away from her shoulder, and pulls her in for a messy kiss. There's no tenderness in it, just a rough meeting of lips, frantic with energy and tension and desire. It's everything she's wanted, and nothing like what she wants, better and worse for it.

Something bangs against the door, probably one of their aides, and Suguru jerks back from the kiss. Something vulnerable and tender flashes across her face, and then she looks at Satoru, and pushes her back.

"Don't touch me," she says, trying to wriggle past her to get to the door.

The sound of that moan rumbles through Satoru's mind, soothing and revving it up all at once, convincing the feral animal part of her brain that yes, this is right, this was good.

Suguru's rough hand in her hair draws an incoherent sound of arousal from her, and she yields to it automatically, tipping her head into it and then moaning into Suguru's mouth. She presses harder up against Suguru, hands curling more possessively around Suguru's hips, kissing her back with savage hunger.

Disoriented as she's just as suddenly shoved back, Satoru blinks in confusion. A little of the feral energy recedes, though her conscious mind doesn't yet reassert itself. Suguru disappears through the door, and a moment later some of their band members are entering the hallway, confused to find Satoru just standing there.

Pliant now, Satoru lets herself be herded through to backstage, given water and electrolytes, and then further helped into her dressing room where her accessories are taken from her. Satoru somehow manages to communicate that she needs a minute--or twenty--and shoos them all away so that she can masturbate, fingers sliding up inside of her body as she thinks of the ferocious way that Suguru kissed her, even though it's about three orgasms later and she's limp from the pleasure of it before she starts to wonder what the hell?

She showers and gets dressed in the soft, loose black pants that they've left for her (something far too expensive and fashionable to be called sweatpants, the fabric swishing loosely around her as she walks) and a soft black top (similarly far too expensive and fashionable to be called a 'peasant' top). Satoru's full breasts are too large for her to go braless, but the embroidered detailing on the revealed bra straps makes them look like they're a feature of the outfit. (Satoru's entire wardrobe is designed like this. Even her loungewear is red carpet-ready.) Her shoes are black espadrilles with bows at the toe, completing the impression that she's just been lounging around a villa in Corsica rather than completing an intense stage performance. Then she wanders back out, willing to be herded wherever her aides tell her to go, wherever her manager (Nanami, who had been one of her bandmates in the original group and then ended up lured back after securing a business degree) has decided she should be at the moment.

Suguru lets the energy linger. She knows if she touches herself, she's going to think about Satoru, and she can't do that immediately, with the taste of Satoru on her lips, the feel of her body pressed against hers. It's not even that it would be improper (which was what tormented her when she was a teenager, how improper it was to think about her best friend and her group mate like that, while her fingers were buried inside her and she was going for climax number three) but that it's too close to what she wants and so far from everything, and makes this entire tour messier than what it already is.

She lets her manager talk at her about the show, accepting her notes and when her manager finally leaves, she stands under the shower for a good thirty minutes, letting the water wash away the tension in her bones. She pins her hair up, and dresses in something less slouchy than her typical backstage outfit. She'd opted for cute lounge pants with a flared cut, and a soft cotton shirt in a deep red that slides off one shoulder. The shoulder that Satoru bit, unfortunately, which means when she heads out of her dressing room, the bruise is visible.

When she wanders into the green room, she sees Nanami almost immediately. She hasn't talked to Nanami or Shoko yet, letting her staff deal with her old friends. And now, she's too tired to do anything, so she nods at her former groupmate, avoids looking at Satoru, and finds her own manager.

It's late, and she wants to return to the hotel room and sleep. There's no VIP after party, at least, but there are a few press handshakes they need to do, some soundbites they need to give. Nothing major, but enough to keep her from thinking too deeply about what she did.

Satoru's eyes widen as she sees what Suguru's wearing and the blossoming bruise on her shoulder. It looks brutal, still fresh and deep pink now but inevitably going to darken to black soon. Satoru turns bright red, looking distinctly guilty and even flinching slightly each time someone asks Suguru what happened. She half expects Suguru to sell her out and reveal that Satoru savaged her, and Satoru doesn't think she can actually refute or deny that.

She manages to put on a smile and play her role in front of the press, but she's quiet again in the car back to the hotel, all her initial hyperactive energy drained out of her.

Lying awake in bed, Satoru thinks about the success of the show, but she thinks more about those moments after the show, Suguru's hand gripping her by the hair and hauling her into a kiss, and then the unhappy look on Suguru's face a moment later. Why had any of that happened? Satoru shouldn't have gone feral like that, obviously, but Suguru was much better about self control usually. It was shocking that the energy of the show would have gotten to Suguru to the point where she'd be willing to kiss just anyone like that. No wonder she was upset afterward, then, that she'd kissed her rival and enemy in a moment of folly.

It isn't until the next day, as they're preparing for that night's show, that Satoru realizes they have a new problem. Satoru's been subdued and guilty all day, and Suguru's been avoiding her. It's terrible energy to bring onto the stage, so Satoru has to figure out a solution to that, fast.

Getting Suguru angry seems like the most efficient approach. Suguru performs great when she's angry.

So Satoru strolls up from behind her and claps a heavy hand over Suguru's bruised shoulder, leaning on it as she gets up in Suguru's space. "Hey, who's afraid of the Big Bad Wolf? You've been avoiding me all day, 'Guru. I didn't think you were that easy to rattle you, but it turns out a little bite is all it takes? Guess I'll have to do that more often."

Her tone has a goading sneer in it, eyes cold and mocking.

At four in the morning, when she couldn't sleep between the coursing energy in her body and the restless, pent up desire, Suguru had gotten off, thinking about her former friend and now... what was Satoru to her? She didn't know. Thinking about her on stage, the matching energy, the playfulness and casual demonstrations of sublime talent, the way she shined so brightly. The bite, after, and the way it had made every pleasure point in Suguru light up. It was, perhaps, the best orgasm she'd had in weeks, and she fell into a deep sleep after that.

So, in addition to feeling annoyed at Satoru, and quietly furious, she had guilt to add to that. It meant she did her best to avoid Satoru, although it was inevitable she'd be found. Because of course it was.

The way Satoru leans on her, putting pressure on her shoulder, makes Suguru squirm. Not entirely out of discomfort, either. But it gives her a reason to jerk away, trying to get away from Satoru's firm grip.

"I told you," she says, enunciating carefully, "don't touch me. I know you think you can get away with touching everyone just because it's you, but I have standards." And you don't fit them is heavily implied. She smiles at Satoru, bright and polite, the sort of smile she used on the executives back in the day. "You're worse than a dog. At least they can be trained. How long has it been since we were together? Ten years now, and you're still incapable of controlling yourself." She clicks her tongue in disappointment and pats Satoru's cheek, all condescending sweetness. "If you need it, we can get you a muzzle. I know just where to get one, I've trained girls like you before."

In reality, she hasn't done such a thing. For all the entwining sadism and masochism she enjoys, she doesn't like petplay much, and certainly not muzzling anyone. She wants backtalk and verbal play and has better ways of silencing people. But she doesn't know the extent of Satoru's knowledge of kink, so it's easy enough to do this.

She drops her hand, and looks around. "Now, if you're done being a rabid dog, I wanted to talk about Control."

Satoru's feeling so triumphant, so smug, having successfully needled Suguru out of her sulking and into a fit of glorious fury, the kind of dressing-down that Satoru always enjoyed seeing her dish out (even when it was against herself--she hadn't used to like that, but now that it made up most of her interactions with Suguru, Satoru had developed a taste for it). Until Suguru gets to the end and her entire brain stutters.

I've trained girls like you before.

It isn't even the idea of the muzzle itself--Satoru's pretty sure that was just metaphor. But the rest of the sentiment rings true. Suguru always was good at taking charge. When she said to do something, Satoru did it without thinking. Sometimes the others had needed clarification, and Nanami especially had tended to push back against casual commands, but Satoru almost always understood immediately what Suguru meant, and had learned from experience that Suguru always had the best ideas.

(Until she hadn't.)

It's the thought of a beautiful woman on her knees in front of Suguru, receiving that sweetly patronizing pat to her cheek.

Had she really? What would that be like? Trained them how?

She's just staring at Suguru, who ... maybe had said something? Seemed to expect some sort of response?

Satoru blinks, cheeks flushed. "What?"

Oh. Oh. Suguru watches Satoru's face, the pretty flush, the dazed look, and she knows she has Satoru curious.

When they had been in the group together, Suguru had been the one to step up and take on the mantle of leadership. She'd been the mom of the group, Haibara too much of a puppy and Nanami too moody despite pushing back, and neither Shoko nor Satoru wanting to take charge, for all that Satoru was undeniably the star. She had taken charge, taken care of all of them until she needed help and none of them had been there for her, and she'd known where to dig when she left because they'd all been so open with her. Especially Satoru, before the fame got her, but even after that. Even after everything.

She still knows how to read Satoru.

Maybe not exactly, not fully, but it's there. Something in her words intrigued Satoru, and Suguru will take advantage of that.

Suguru's lips curl into a wicked, wicked grin. She doesn't mention it, and moves on to the actual question she has, but the knowledge is there.

"Contact. The song?" She raises an eyebrow. "The duet. The emotions in it." She frowns, her lips twisting into a pout, and contemplates her words. Despite the annoyance and the dressing down, she is serious about the song, and she doesn't want to set Satoru off, so she picks her next words carefully. She tries to think about what she would have said to Satoru when they were younger. She was kinder then, especially to Satoru. A bitch, but it didn't have the same force, or the same push, and Satoru would rise to it in a vastly different way. "I'm not sure the emotions in it are resonating. Do you want to try to pick up something different, take it from another angle? You were mirroring my emotions, but it doesn't need to be mirrored, despite what the lyrics are doing."

Edited 2025-05-19 14:23 (UTC)

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject