marlowemuses | My Boyfriend (Who Lives in Canada)

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My Boyfriend (Who Lives in Canada)

Satoru loved his friends. He loved college, the freedom and connection of it, the knowledge and collaboration. He loved sitting around a lunch table with his friends, chattering on about nonsense and teasing each other.

And he was a little bit in love with his roommate, Suguru, who was seated beside him at the table. The six of them were crammed in to a booth that was only designed for four, so Satoru was basically mashed up against Suguru's side, their thighs sealed together and their shoulders brushing every time one of them moved. It felt electric, and Satoru was trying to ignore the little zings of desire that shot through him every time Suguru moved, or how his arm stretched out along the back of the booth, so close to being draped over Satoru's shoulders.

At the moment, Satoru was regaling them all with the story of some girl who had asked him out, and he hadn't realized that she was asking him out until the fourth(?) attempt when she'd finally gotten exasperated and just demanded are you gay or something?

"What'd you say?" Shoko asked, idly curious but not super invested, spinning her spoon against the bottom of her empty bowl.

"Oh. Just, like, no, I'm just not interested."

"Yeah, same as you've said every time someone has asked you out," Utahime contributed, with a little snort. "More likely you're just ace."

Silence descended around the table, somewhere between shocked and awkward. Satoru stared at her, lips parted, and for a moment he genuinely considered it. Am I asexual?

But then Suguru shifted very slightly, either out of awkwardness or intent to say something, and his arm brushed against the back of Satoru's neck. The bolt of lust that went through him shot straight to his cock. Right. Not asexual.

"I'm not," Satoru insisted, the words spilling indignantly from his mouth before he could think about them. "I have a boyfriend."

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"Feels ... embarrassing," Satoru says, when Suguru hoists a leg over his shoulder like that, splaying him open like this, showing his most intimate places. He wants to snap his legs shut and hide his cleft and his hole, but he manages to limit the impulse to just a little squirming. "It's weird, to think of it as, um. Appealing. To be touched there. Or to want to touch someone there."

But it's not an objection, it's just nervous chatter. He's determined to try this, and he isn't going to spook until he's made an effort to at least let Suguru demonstrate how fingering is supposed to be done. "I don't know how I'm supposed to relax while you're touching my butthole, Suguru. Give clearer directions." He tries to give it comedic delivery, but his cheeks are flushed with nerves and embarrassment, and he can't quite hold Suguru's gaze.

The nervous rambling just makes Suguru laugh, low and soft and affection, and he turns his head to press a kiss to the knee on his shoulder, nipping at the same spot a second later.

"Don't clench that butthole," he orders, lips quirking into a brief smile. When he talks again, he tries to inject some formality into his tone. "If you're so determined to have specific directions. Think about how you felt when I put my mouth on your penis and how boneless you felt after that." As he talks, he presses his forefinger against Satoru's hole, slowly pushing the tip inside, then pulling it back and reaching for the bottle of lube again so he can pour some directly on Satoru's hole. He spreads it around, pushing some inside as he presses his finger in him again, deeper this time.

"It's going to feel a little weird and uncomfortable at first," he continues, more serious this time. Satoru feels so tight and warm around his finger, just like this, but he doesn't mention that yet. "Give it a little time, you'll adjust. But if it really hurts, let me know. Don't try to suffer through it."

"You're so embarrassing," Satoru grouses, rolling his eyes at his boyfriend, though the teasing does help to ease a little of his awkward nerves. "I definitely can't relax while you're saying 'penis' like you're a health teacher. Worst dirty talk. I thought you were good at this?"

He bites his lip, this time to try and contain a smile, because talking shit at Suguru also helps to relax him. But then he flusters again as Suguru's finger actually starts pushing inside.

"It doesn't hurt. It's fine. I just don't see the appeal. On either side." Satoru gives him an impatient look, partly to try and cover for his nervousness.

"I was matching your energy. You're the one talking about buttholes," Suguru points out, sticking his tongue out at his boyfriend. "So crude, so blunt. No sense of charm. I'll just have to talk about how tight you feel around my finger, how warm and velvety you are in here." His voice drops, a low purr that he hopes appeals. "You should see how your hole clenches around my finger, so eager to suck me in. You might not see the appeal, but I do."

Suguru lifts his gaze from Satoru's hole to study his face again as he pushes his finger deeper inside, carefully curling it and brushing against his walls. It's just a finger, so it's mostly a tease, and he isn't trying to find his prostate yet.

The impatient look makes him smirk, and he tightens his grip on Satoru's leg, squeezing a little. "More, sweetheart?" he asks. "Don't worry. I won't leave you unsatisfied."

Since he does want Satoru to enjoy this for his sake, and not just because Suguru likes it, he pulls his finger back, so he can slowly add in a second, which is much more of a stretch; Suguru's fingers are long and elegant, but they are thick.

Satoru's eyes widen with shock as Suguru starts talking like that, and his hole gives an instinctive clench around Suguru's finger. He stares, lips parted and cheeks flaming, stunned at how Suguru talks about this, about how appealing he makes it sound. Even though Satoru still doesn't see the appeal, he's ready to be convinced of just about anything if Suguru's going to talk about it like that.

He makes a tiny sound in his throat as Suguru pushes in a second finger, because now he can feel the strain in his muscles. It's uncomfortable, but not bad enough for him to want to stop, and Suguru's words are still ringing in his head.

"Is that ..." He can't stop staring at Suguru. "Is that what dirty talk is supposed to be like?" He had no idea. He realizes now that he's never heard good dirty talk, only jokey pervert stuff in anime or the weird and monotonous phrases he'd heard in what little porn he watched.

"Like what?" Suguru asks, briefly confused; that wasn't even necessarily the sexiest thing he's said before, or all that intense in terms of dirty talk. But this is Satoru he's talking to, and Suguru's perception of Satoru has drastically changed over the past few hours. The inexperience with everything isn't that surprising. "It should be something to turn you on. Sometimes it works for people, and sometimes it doesn't."

Suguru has always enjoyed it, from either side, and he likes seeing the flush rising in Satoru's cheeks from the comments.

He drops his attention back to his fingers, carefully working them into Satoru and curling them. Normally, when he's fingered anyone, it's been with the intent to prep them for penetration, but this doesn't have a goal beyond seeing if Satoru enjoys it, and he's in no rush. He's a little slow about it, teasing and letting him adjust before fucking his fingers in deeper. He's not directly aiming for Satoru's prostate, but his fingers brush against it as he curls them, and he adds external stimulation, pressing his thumb against his perineum.

"I dunno," Satoru says, flustered and embarrassed, scowling a little as he turns defensive. "It was fine. It was whatever."

His eyes skid to the side, breath coming a little quicker as Suguru's fingers keep moving inside of him. He's not even sure when it is that something shifts in the experience. It was all just vaguely uncomfortable, uninteresting, but somewhere in the distraction of Suguru's dirty talk and the second finger adding a slight sting, something has changed. He feels a sensation that's almost urgent, a building warmth in his belly, and finds that his hips have started stirring upward into Suguru's touch, chasing something unknown.

It's embarrassing, somehow. The vulnerability of being touched like this, combined with the possibility that Suguru was right.

His breath stutters, nerves rising, and he's flustered by this new experience, not knowing how to feel about it.

"You can tell me anything," Suguru reminds him. "Especially when we're doing things like this."

"This" is such a vague term, but he knows Satoru will get it, considering where his fingers are. And he's not going to push at the moment, with his fingers deep inside Satoru. By this point, he'd be pushing for three fingers, but Satoru is still tight, and with the way his breath stutters, Suguru is sure he shouldn't try three fingers yet.

But he keeps fucking his fingers into Satoru, turning his head to kiss his knee again. Thinking about it, he should have grabbed a pillow to put under Satoru's hips, which would have helped; as it is, he can't really lean over and kiss him.

"You're doing so well, baby," he says, as he angles his fingers, deliberately hitting his prostate as he presses inside Satoru and pulls back. "How does it feel?"

That sensation is rising, all needy urgency and sparkling warmth, like there's some secret tucked inside Satoru's body that's been waiting for Suguru to unlock it. A little of Satoru's defensive bluster slips away, impossible to maintain while his body is starting to writhe and arch up into the touch, hips grinding into Suguru's fingers.

He whines as Suguru targets that spot more directly, sending bright, hot flares of sensation up his spine. It all feels so embarrassing, and he's so needy at the sensation. Part of him is still so deeply flustered that Suguru is touching his ass--is touching inside his ass. It feels awkward and dirty, and he can't cope with his feelings on it, even though he doesn't want Suguru to stop.

Even though Suguru's just asked him a question, Satoru can't figure out how to put any of his feelings into words. He just whines again, pressing a hand over his face even as his hips keep rocking into the touch, shamelessly greedy for this.

Satoru's reactions are delicious; Suguru could watch them every day. He's torn between watching the play of emotions across his face, and the way his body writhes under Suguru's fingers. He hopes Satoru enjoys it, and for more reasons than just indulging Suguru.

Suguru pauses for a moment, fingers deep inside Satoru, and adjusts his grip on Satoru's leg, letting it fall off his shoulder so he can lean in and kiss him again, lips firm against Satoru's. It's not the best position for fingering him, but Suguru's flexible enough, and tall enough, that he can manage it, even if his fingers aren't pressing in as deeply as before. He can still hit his prostate, which helps.

Satoru reaches for him gratefully, hands pressed to either side of Suguru's face to keep him close as he kisses his boyfriend. He sucks on his lips and tongue, whimpering with need as he writhes faster, hips bucking more desperately into Suguru's hand.

As he gets closer, he ducks his head to press his face against the side of Suguru's neck, clinging to him as he gasps and shudders his way through a quick, intense orgasm. Then he pushes at Suguru's arm to make him stop, clinging to his boyfriend and quivering beneath him, breath coming in quick little gasps.

Suguru can feel the clench of Satoru's hole around his fingers as the orgasm hits. Along with the way Satoru clings to him, breath warm against his neck, Suguru feels incredibly turned on, cock hard and leaking already, just from having his boyfriend fall apart in his arms.

He pulls his fingers out slowly when Satoru pushes at his arm, and pulls him in closer, nuzzling against his head. "How did that feel?"

"You can just come from that?" Satoru gasps, when he's able to talk, indignant and flustered at finding that Suguru was so thoroughly right and that there's this entire aspect of his own pleasure and anatomy that he knew nothing about. "I can come from just that?" He hides his face against Suguru's shoulder and whines, embarrassed but also extremely interested in continuing to learn more. "Is it ... is it even better with a cock? Or not as good?"

"You just did," Suguru comments, amused by his reaction. It's adorable and cute, and he likes that Satoru is so flustered about it, and curious. It reminds him of a cat. He wonders if he can call Satoru his cute kitten—something to test another time.

"Consensus is that it's usually better with a cock, provided the person knows how to use theirs." Suguru does. "It's usually bigger, so you'll feel fuller, and there are different angles you can get. But sometimes it might be too much."

Satoru keeps his face pressed to Suguru's shoulder, still quivering from the pleasure, overstimulation, and indignation of this new experience. He feels like his mind isn't catching up, unable to cope with all his emotions and sensations. He wants, and he doesn't know how to deal with it. He wants his boyfriend close, he wants more pleasure, he wants to win Suguru's approval. He's greedy for all of it.

"Do it, then," Satoru says, fierce and determined. He's going to figure this out. He's going to be good at this. When it's Suguru with him, he can do anything, and this new realm of experiences is something he's going to claim. "Fuck me."

Suguru stares at him for a moment, giving him a quizzical look. "Right now?" He knew Satoru was stubborn and determined at the best of times, but this hardly seemed like a necessary time to be stubborn. He leans in again, kisses along his jaw. "You're going to be sensitive."

Which could be good, or could make him so sensitive it was no longer pleasurable.

"We don't have to rush into it." As much as Suguru would love to fuck him, he didn't want it to be an uncomfortable time.

"Ugh, how are either of those real reasons?" Satoru grumbles, though he blushes with pleasure at those sweet kisses along his jaw. "Come on, either give me a real reason or just fuck me. Put it in."

Rumbling at the back of his throat with the force of all his emotions bubbling up in him, Satoru bit down hard on Suguru's shoulder. He felt impatient and needy, overwhelmed with affection, embarrassment, desire, and insecurity. It was too much to cope with, so he grabbed for distraction and a challenge, something new to focus on, something he could succeed at.

"They're real reasons!" Suguru starts, although he's interrupted by the bite, completely unexpected. It makes Suguru yelp, more out of surprise than actual pain, and he lifts his head, doing his best to level a look at Satoru, although he's mostly amused by it, rather than hurt or offended.

"Didn't realize you were a biter," he says, turning his head again and kissing Satoru's cheek. "Give me a moment."

Not having expected anything more than blowjobs and some fingering, he hadn't grabbed a condom, and he certainly isn't going to fuck Satoru without more stretching and lube. So he rummages in his drawer for a condom, and returns to kneel between his legs, dropping the small package on Satoru's stomach, avoiding the mess between them.

"I'm opening to stretch you more," he says in explanation, as he lubes up his fingers, rubbing them together to warm it slightly. "Grab a pillow and tuck it under your hips for me?"

"Why would you not think I'm a biter?" Satoru asks, unapologetic. He studies Suguru's shoulder, hoping he left a mark. Maybe he can leave more marks.

Less nervous now that it's decided, Satoru picks up the condom packet, holding it between two of his fingers like a go piece as he turns it. He considers the little thing, but then pauses his thinking so he can obey by grabbing a pillow, settling it under his hips. Then he looks at the condom again. "Why do we need this? You're not gonna get me pregnant, Suguru."

Obviously, there's no need to worry about pregnancy, but does Satoru not know about safe sex? Suguru stares at him. "Because there are other things to worry about? You might be a virgin, but I'm not, and what if I have something?" He doesn't; Suguru's been consistently good about condoms and testing himself routinely. But the point still stands.

"You do know about sexually transmitted infections, right? You should always use protection unless you are in a committed relationship and you and your partner have gotten tested and have discussed this. I should have used a condom for the blowjob, but I was excited enough not to think about it." He'll possibly have to buy more condoms if they're going to keep doing this, which.... Well. Suguru wants to, for so many reasons.

"And don't ever trust a guy who says he can't wear one, for whatever reason. Also, sex is messy, and condoms make clean up easier."

That point is less of an issue, considering they've already messed up the bed and planned to sleep on the second bed.

Satoru listens to all of this with an unimpressed look, but he lets Suguru talk himself out. "Yeah?"

Still holding the condom up between his fingers, Satoru tips his head to the side. "Gosh, okay, Suguru, I'll be sure to insist on it with all the other guys who are gonna fuck me."

He tosses the condom at Suguru, aiming to hit him between the eyes, but it's not exactly an aerodynamic missile, so he doesn't expect to succeed. "You didn't need it for the blowjob, we already discussed that I'm a fucking virgin. So is this not a committed relationship? You're gonna keep slutting it up?" He's not sure why he's going at this like he's trying to pick a fight. Jealous, he supposes. The reminder of Suguru having all those other partners got under his skin.

The foil packet doesn't hit him between the eyes, but it does hit his chin before falling gracelessly to the bed. Suguru looks at it and then Satoru, raising an eyebrow at his boyfriend. "Of course I'm not going to keep sleeping around with other people. What the hell, Satoru? We talked about that just a little while ago." They had, hadn't they? He'd promised a committed relationship. Maybe, in the past few weeks, not as much as he had been before Satoru came into his life, but he's not been celibate either.

"And I don't expect anyone else to fuck you, but you seem to have missed the talk about safe sex. I had been sleeping around, and you should demand I get a clean bill of health before I fuck you."

"I didn't miss the talk about safe sex," Satoru says indignantly, cheeks flaming, scowling off to one side. He takes it as having lost this point, no longer sure of his own position in the argument. So he avoids Suguru's gaze because he's embarrassed. "So, fine. Hurry up and get tested already. And no, of course I'm not going to fuck around and you're not allowed to, either."

His legs curl around Suguru's hips, possessive of him, even while he's still looking away and sulking. "Of course I'd insist on it if it was anyone but you. I trust you, moron."

"I'm not allowed to? Possessive, I like it," Suguru says, teasingly. He leans in, nuzzling against Satoru's cheek. "Stop sulking when I'm about to fuck you for the first time. As cute as you are when you sulk, it's not how I envisioned a first time with you." Which implies that he did think about that, but Suguru isn't going to talk about that. "And what if I had something and wasn't disclosing it? Or maybe I don't even know if I have something."

He shouldn't let Satoru get away with looking cute and sulky; he should insist on the condom. It's not like he can go get tested at eight in the evening, and it's not an instant thing. Suguru is sure he doesn't have anything; he hasn't had penetrative sex with anyone since his last test. So he wavers, staring down at Satoru as he hovers above him.

The condom is already on the bed, glinting sadly, and he glances at the packet, then flicks it away, acutely aware he's being far too indulgent about this. But Satoru is cute and Suguru wants to indulge him, even in this. Maybe especially in this.

Satoru's laughter quickly returns at Suguru's teasing and nuzzling, but he rolls his eyes at the what-ifs. "'Wasn't disclosing it'," he echoes, with another roll of his eyes, because he feels like that was covered under I trust you, moron.

Thinking that the matter was resolved already, Satoru blinks up at him when Suguru pauses and stares. He tilts his head slightly, confused as to why Suguru has paused like this. It even takes a moment after Suguru's flicked the condom away.

Then Satoru laughs, bright and pleased to get his way--as usual.

"You're mine," Satoru tells him, grinning up at his boyfriend. "Okay, ugh, hurry up. Stop getting distracted."

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