marlowemuses | I want to feel my heart pounding in my chest

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I want to feel my heart pounding in my chest

They'd made it sound like a scholarship at first, an honor earned from his intelligence and hard work.

Adam had thought that this was the ticket he'd worked so hard to earn, his entry to the capitol's university. He couldn't imagine what else would summon him--him, Adam Parrish, by name--to the palace.

The reality was baffling and frustrating. He'd spent the past hours being interviewed and tested by an array of officials and tutors who claimed that he was being considered for a position as the prince's companion. It wasn't a position Adam wanted, but everyone so far had emphasized what an honor it was, and Adam's polite, non-confrontational attitude toward authority was deeply ingrained. But he had his pride and his temper, too. He'd refused to open his mouth to let them check his teeth like he was a horse for sale.

After the fifth minister left, evidently satisfied with Adam's intelligence and ambition, Adam paced the room.

This had to stop. Adam didn't want to be here, and he didn't want to play babysitter to the spoiled prince of the kingdom. He had ambitions. He had his place in the university all but guaranteed, as soon as he could save up enough money for his entry. They could take their 'great honor' and stuff it up the prince's ass.

Diatribe ready, Adam whirled on the next person to open the door, ready to tell them just what he thought of their nonsense interviews. He wasn't anticipating a teenage boy his own age. Startled, Adam drew up short, dropping his eyes to the floor. This had to be the prince. And while the kingdom had advanced past the days of public executions, Adam knew that any of the royal family could ruin his prospects permanently if he displeased them.

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Ronan turns on his side so he can look at Adam. "What if we could get one now? We're by the water as to be a boat around here."

His arm stretches out above his head and he uses it for a pillow. In the glow of the firelight he's opening staring at Adam. He's still a little taken aback by the shape of his eyes and his lips. "I've never seen anyone who looks like you."

Strange, strange compliment.

"What's your plan?" Adam asks. He smiles a tiny bit, because he's interested in their new scheme and he doesn't mind Ronan analyzing his looks. He keeps his eyes closed. "Steal a boat or wake up some poor fisherman and buy it?"

Ronan pushes a strand of Adam's hair off his face carefully with his index finger. "Well. I think if I throw money at this problem you would be bugged. But enticed by someone like me doing something like stealing."

Adam's eyes flick open, but he doesn't object to the touch. He's not used to gentle, careful touches like this.

He has to think about how he feels about Ronan stealing a boat. He doesn't like Ronan buying it with his father's money, like it's nothing, or using his title to commandeer it. Adam's never stolen anything in his life. He prefers earning things honestly. Taking things and breaking rules isn't necessarily against his moral code, but taking things that other people earned with hard work is.

"I suppose it depends on what we're stealing and from whom."

"What if we're stealing it from my dreams?" His fingers slowly drift to the end of that strand of hair. It's so long. Ronan is thinking about how sliding his hand through it would feel.

"Do you look like your mom or dad?"

"More my mom than my dad," Adam says, though he doesn't think he looks much like either and he's grateful for that. His eyes linger on Ronan, wary of the significance of being petted like this, but also not certain he objects to it.

"I don't believe you." It's not a challenge or an accusation, merely a statement of fact. Stealing things from dreams doesn't sound real.

There were a dozen different, corny things he was thinking to say, but didn't. He wasn't sure how to flirt without being either corny or irritating. He was better at insults. Ronan drew his hand back even though he wanted to keep touching him in some way.

"Let's start small." Ronan smirks. "Tell me something you want. Tell me what it looks like or what it does."

There were so many things that Adam wanted, but they ranged from huge and intangible (independence, a house of his own, enough gold to survive indefinitely) to small and pitiful (an apple, a full night's sleep, shoes without holes). Adam's pride prevented him from asking for anything related to basic survival, and he'd had little opportunity to want for anything when his life was taken up with basic needs.

He watched Ronan, guarded and considering.

He wanted a salve for his hands. He wanted a blanket to lie on the beach. He wanted more food.

"A piece of candy," Adam said at last, picking something so small that he could bear to ask for it without stinging his pride.

"Candy?" Ronan keeps watching him. "Maybe not that small. Little bigger. I mean, if I'm trying to impress you...." He found Adam's hand and laced their fingers together.

"Are you trying to impress me?" Adam asked. His fingers curled around Ronan's in return, holding his hand. He liked contact with Ronan. He liked the careful, reverent way that Ronan touched him.

No one had ever wanted to impress Adam before, and he didn't know what to think of it. The prince had no friends, because he was too brash on the surface, but beneath he was very clearly soft and careful. It puzzled Adam that no one else had stuck around to see it, when it had been so easy for him to find the Ronan beneath the initial rudeness. This Ronan wanted to show him wonders and secrets--the horse, the beach, his claim of stolen dreams--without hesitation, and Adam didn't think he half deserved the trust that he'd earned from Ronan.

"Of course I am." Adam clearly didn't care about his money, power or position. He respected people based on merit. Ronan wanted to earn that respect. He had never kept friends because they were all the same. Other kids from other rich, royal, noble families. They cared about the same things his brother cared about and cared about none of the things Ronan thought were important.

"Anything you can think of...just tell me, I can give it to you."

Adam grinned a little, bemused but pleased by Ronan's earnest determination to please him. It was a fascinating and heady thought to be offered anything he wanted by the prince of a kingdom.

"A piece of candy," Adam repeated, refusing to ask for anything more. He didn't care about Ronan's wonders, and he wasn't about to be bribed. He wanted to be friends with Ronan because he liked the prince.

"Stubborn." Said in a playful tone. Ronan liked that. Adam didn't had principal and wouldn't be bribed. He liked him all the more for it.

Ronan smirked. "Alright. A piece of candy." Still holding Adam's hand Ronan fell to sleep. It didn't take him long and he was opening his blue eyes slowly. Between their clasped hands is a piece of candy. When Adam puts it in his mouth it will taste like his favorite things and it will make him feel good.

Adam watches him, bewildered, as he closes his eyes and seems to sleep. It's what he promised, after all, stealing from dreams, but it still seems strange and unbelievable. Adam watches him closely, struck by how young he looks in sleep. Vulnerable. Handsome.

Ronan's hand twitched against his and Adam blinked, confused to find a requested piece of candy in their clasped hands.

Taking his hand back, he considered it, watching Ronan warily, and then put it in his mouth. His eyes closed with pleasure, stunned by the feelings that washed over him at the taste of the candy.

So Ronan was magic. Powerful, world-changing magic. And he was willing to offer the secret openly to Adam.

"You can make a boat?" Adam asked, thinking about all the possibilities contained in Ronan's powers.

"I think I can make anything." So far he hadn't found a limitation. Then again he hadn't tried for anything that wasn't easy to hide.

Watching Adam with the candy he smiles. "Do you like it?"

"Yeah." Adam took Ronan's hand again, giving it a squeeze. He smiled a little, shy but pleased. They could get their boat without anything that would bother Adam's moral code, and then they'd have all the world at their fingertips. Freedom.

Adam had only had a friend for a few hours, but already his whole world had shifted. Everything had re-centered around Ronan. Adam's studies and his career still meant so much to him, but the opportunity of freedom and adventure on equal terms was something he couldn't pass up.

"I'm gonna sleep now, okay?"

"You want to sleep out here?" Ronan got a little closer. "We can go back to the palace....or I could get a blanket or a tent."

"I thought that was the idea," Adam said, smiling at his friend. His heart thudded a little at the way Ronan scooted closer to him. "Sleep on the beach to give myself the excuse not to go home."

His eyes lingered on Ronan's, holding his gaze steadily. "I wouldn't say no to that tent," he decided.

"Yeah. That's the plan." He smirked. "But I feel a little bad making you sleep on the ground."

Ronan smiles at that. Adam doesn't think he's weird. Isn't scared by what he can do. "A tent and a blanket."

"Well, if I'd gone home, you'd be sleeping on the ground. And I'm too proud to stay at the castle." Their hands are still clasped, and Adam doesn't want to let go. He doesn't look away, liking the way that Ronan looks when he smiles.

"Why are you too proud to stay there?" Ronan wasn't upset by it. Actually he found Adam's honesty about staying there refreshing. "It's just a building."

"I don't want your charity, and I don't want to be rescued," Adam answered, a little bit of wariness returning to his eyes. Of course Ronan didn't get it. As the prince, everything had always been his for the taking.

"I don't want to rescue you." He fired back quickly. Ronan closes his eyes and takes a slow breath. "I'm not trying to argue or push you, Adam. I'm curious. I want to know who you are. I think you are worth knowing." His thumbs brushes Adam's palm. "Really knowing. Not surface level bullshit. That's all."

He shifts so he's laying on his back. "Just need a couple of minutes." Don't leave, he thinks before closing his eyes again. Another breath and he drifts off to sleep.

Adam watches him again, the way he drifts off into his stealing dreams. He's intrigued by Ronan's earnestness. The way that although it was supposed to be Adam earning a place at the prince's side, now it's Ronan who wants to earn a place at Adam's side. Ronan makes him feel like he's worthy and exceptional in a way that no practical accomplishment ever has.

Ronan has always been the sort of person who wanted relationships and people in his life that mattered. The kinds of friends that you know would help you bury a body. The kind of friendship you had to earn, not the kind that was given freely because you had a title. Ronan wanted Adam to like him because Adam doesn't like the things about him that everyone else cares about.

He drifts to sleep thinking about a tent. It starts as simple canvas. Poles. Then it takes shape in his mind. A floor. Fabric that keeps it cozy and warm while letting them see through to the stars above them. He dreams of cozy blankets that envelop them and feel like laying in a cloud. It's all so real. He can feel it in his fingers. Smell it. And that is the perfect moment to wake up.

One minute it isn't there. The next it is. With Ronan inside, fighting off the sleep that renders him useless for a few moments after.

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