marlowemuses | Written in the Stars

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Written in the Stars

It still felt incredible to Adam that he was here, on this starship, in a navigator's uniform. He tried not to gape openly as he made his way through the ship, following the map on his communicator to find the quarters that he'd been assigned.

He'd been born in the colonies, and had known want all his life. Testing into the navigator program--on a full scholarship--was a dream come true. Years of hard work and training and it still seemed surreal. But he was here. He'd made it. He was a navigator.

The door to his quarters opened with a touch, already coded to his fingerprint. The room was simple and utilitarian, but it had a private bathroom and there was plenty of space. In terms of what Adam was accustomed to in the colonies, this was luxurious.

Dropping his bag on the lower bunk, Adam sank down to sit on the edge of the bed, leaning back and closing his eyes for a moment. He drifted off almost immediately, chronically sleep-deprived by the level of training and study he required of himself in order to stay at the top of his class.

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Adam lifted his weight quickly at that hiss, breaking all contact and hovering just above Ronan, studying his eyes with clear worry. In trying to protect Ronan from being hurt, he'd somehow hurt Ronan anyway. As much as Adam wanted to keep kissing him, he couldn't bear to hurt Ronan. "Did I hurt you?" he asked, thighs straining as he kept himself just above Ronan's waist. He curled his hand gently around Ronan's cheek, because the thought of not touching Ronan right now was unendurable.

"No, I'm fine-- just hurts like a bitch. It's fine." The contradiction there didn't seem to occur to him, but that was either from the pain itself or the medication kicking in.

However badly he'd wanted to peel Adam's clothes off before, pain was a very effective libido killer. Instead of pressing up against him, Ronan let his body go slack and relaxed into the mattress as much as he could.

"Can we do this later?" he asked.

Adam nodded, moving off of him carefully. "I'm going to check your wounds," he said. It wasn't a request. Adam could be respectful of Ronan's space and pride in other ways, but he wasn't going to take no for an answer in terms of making sure none of Ronan's wounds tore or took an infection.

Pushing up Ronan's shirt, Adam checked the stitches with careful touches, making sure there was no blood, swelling or infection. Everything looked fine, and he pulled Ronan's shirt back down, hand lingering for just a moment on an unhurt section of Ronan's belly.

Careful and attentive though he was, Adam was also subdued and quieter than he had been a moment ago. He liked the idea that Ronan wanted him, but he also didn't know what this was, and insecurity nagged at his heart.

"I said I'm fine," Ronan protested. That was the only resistance he put up. He watched Adam inspect his injuries, frowning at him.

As much as he'd wanted Adam to take off his shirt and touch him, the reality did not match up to his expectations. He didn't have a good view of himself, but he imagined he looked terrible with God knew how many stitches.

"You done now?" he asked. "I'm not going to bleed out because we were--" Oh. Uhm, this was somehow weirder to say out loud than he thought it would be. "Making out."

"I'm done now," Adam confirms, not offering any pleasantries to soothe the situation or to reassure Ronan that he'd just wanted to make sure he hadn't strained anything. He took his hand away. Looking Ronan over briefly to make sure his face didn't reflect any especially high levels of pain, Adam pulled the blankets up over him to keep him warm.

"I'm going to go get us some food. Try to rest." That was that, in Adam's eyes. Not looking at Ronan, Adam got up and started changing into a clean uniform.

Ronan started to get up but the pain reminded him that lying down was his only real option. He stared at Adam, his own brow furrowed slightly.

What had he said? Should he not have mentioned what they were doing? God, what were they doing?

"You can't stay?" As hard as he tried not to sound vulnerable, he heard it in his voice. He shouldn't hate himself too much for it. It was understandable, he guessed, given he'd nearly died.

Adam softened a little, though he finished changing before he came over. Kneeling by Ronan's side, Adam kissed him softly. "I'll only be gone a few minutes. Try to rest more. You need food to help your body heal. I need food."

Normally Adam didn't mind missing a meal or two. But he'd missed dinner last night from refusing to leave Ronan's side, and breakfast this morning. They both needed food, and Adam was the only one available to get it for them.

"Rest and don't strain anything," Adam ordered. "And I'll kiss you again when I get back."

He kissed Ronan's forehead, to teasingly reinforce that Ronan wouldn't be getting another kiss until Adam returned with food.

Ronan wasn't entirely sure he'd be up for kissing whenever that was, but if Adam was hungry then he shouldn't get in the way of that. He liked him as he was, but he probably had several years worth of nutrition to catch up on.

"No promises," Ronan said though he was fairly certain he'd fall asleep five minutes after Adam left.

Adam went to the mess hall, getting plenty of food for them both so that he wouldn't have to leave again for dinner. He was asked about Ronan and kept all conversations short. Yes, he was wounded, he was getting better, Adam needed to return and care for him.

It took longer than Adam would have liked, but soon enough he returned with food for them both, setting it down on the floor near their bed and curling up next to Ronan to kiss him as promised.

Ronan barely stirred when Adam kissed him. He sighed and, feeling Adam next to him, didn't bother opening his eyes.

"Get food?" he asked, struggling to regain coherency.

Even taking his exhaustion into account, it was hard to think. Everything was so hazy and unfocused. He felt so raw and needy and-- emotional. For once those emotions weren't anger.

"Yes." Adam stroked his hand over Ronan's forehead, kissing him again softly. He wanted Ronan to rest, but he also needed to make sure that Ronan stayed hydrated and fed. The strength of this protective impulse surprised him, but he didn't mind it when it came to Ronan. "Do you think you can swallow a little broth for me?"

"I'm not a baby," Ronan muttered. He appreciated how protective Adam was. Hell, just knowing Adam liked him was great. But there were limits.

He very slowly tried to ease himself up into a sitting position. He couldn't put much weight on his arms at all so the process was slow and painful.

This part he hated.

“I know that,” Adam responded. He wasn’t about to soothe Ronan’s ego on the topic, and if Ronan didn’t want help, Adam wouldn’t insist. He picked up the container of warm broth, holding it for Ronan as he waited for him to sit up.

"So don't talk to me like one." He was able to sit so long as he leaned against the wall. He held out his hand to take the bowl.

"Never though I'd be happy to see this shit," he grumbled. Then when his hand brushed against Adam's, he spoke again in a far different tone. "You've got nice hands."

"Fuck you," Adam responded to the scolding. There wasn't much heat behind his retort, but he still prickled at it, defenses rising.

Adam's pride was too sensitive to turn around quickly enough to respond to the compliment, so he just ignored it. He stayed sitting close by Ronan's side, however, and reached for more of the food so that he could feed himself.

"Later," Ronan said without thinking. He realized what he said a moment later. His face flushed and he quickly raised his bowl so it hide his blush.

It would have been one thing if it was just trash talk. He'd often heard that retort during fights among the fighters or, hell, people back home. It was different when he actually meant it as something that would happen. It made him feel faint-- or giddy? He didn't know. This was all new to him. God, it was exciting.

Adam didn't really process it at first. It didn't mean anything in particular and it wasn't until Ronan suddenly went red and ducked his head that Adam glanced over. Then he realized, and laughed.

It was a surprised, breathless little laugh, but Adam didn't laugh often and hadn't laughed for years before Ronan. Being around Ronan made him smile easier, and the laugh felt good. He was charmed by how embarrassed Ronan was at his own statement. "Don't start flirting or I'll call you 'baby'," he teased, smiling into his food.

"Fuck you." Ronan laughed, then winced. His stomach hurt and he instinctively pressed his hand to still his muscles. His face was now a bright pink instead of red.

He finished his broth as quickly as he could. To his surprise, once he started eating he realized just how hungry he'd been all this time. If he weren't exhausted by the end of it, he might have asked if Adam had anything else. Instead, he set his bowl aside and eased back down again. He inched closer to Adam to settle against him.

“Not going anywhere, baby,” Adam murmured, resting his hand against Ronan’s forehead. He finished eating one-handed, then picked up his tablet again, settling in beside Ronan to read as he watched over him.

He looked up at Adam. His vision wasn't hazy and Adam's face was clear and in focus, but the world still seemed like a blur. Real but not. In spite of the surreal moment, he knew that Adam was here. This solid and warm, living being beside him who somehow wanted to be with him.

And there he was, here but concentrating as always on that tablet. It reminded him of how he himself used to be. Virgil and Seneca and all the other philosophers he secretly still loved.

"I bet you were a nerd," he said at last.

“How dare you use the past tense,” Adam replied, not looking up. His fingers smoothed over Ronan’s brow and then lingered on the edge of Ronan’s cheekbone, mapping Ronan’s face with his fingertips. He could feel Ronan’s gaze on him, but it didn’t bother him any more than usual, though Ronan didn’t seem entirely lucid. He tracked his fingers down the sharp edge of Ronan’s nose, hesitating for a moment at the tip as he realized that the trajectory had brought him to Ronan’s lips.

"A bigger nerd." Though Ronan wondered if it might be the other way around. That would be impressive given how little there was to read here unless navigators had even more privileges than he'd thought.

He closed his eyes. He sighed as Adam drew his hands over his face. There was no pain with this like there had been with the kissing. Just gentle touches. When Adam stopped, Ronan tilted his head back so his lips brushed against his fingers.

Adam smiled, cheeks flushing, as Ronan’s lips touched his fingers. He traced the outline of them, feeling the soft warmth of Ronan’s mouth against his fingertips. It was chaste, and yet there was something searingly erotic about it. Adam had to shift slightly as his cock gave a little throb. He unbent one of his legs, stretching it out as subtly as he could while his fingers kept teasing sweetly at Ronan’s lips.

Ronan relaxed back against the mattress. With the painkillers he no longer felt as sore but he didn't have the drive to do more than kiss Adam's fingers. When he lay back, he let Adam's hand rest over him.

"Mm. You still have calluses."

"Shh, you'll give away my secret that I used to be less of a nerd," Adam said, cupping his hand around Ronan's cheek and settling in to read. He felt utterly content like this, keeping watch over Ronan, who wanted to kiss him. His fighter. His friend. Maybe even something more.

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