marlowemuses | My Boyfriend (Who Lives in Canada)

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My Boyfriend (Who Lives in Canada)

Satoru loved his friends. He loved college, the freedom and connection of it, the knowledge and collaboration. He loved sitting around a lunch table with his friends, chattering on about nonsense and teasing each other.

And he was a little bit in love with his roommate, Suguru, who was seated beside him at the table. The six of them were crammed in to a booth that was only designed for four, so Satoru was basically mashed up against Suguru's side, their thighs sealed together and their shoulders brushing every time one of them moved. It felt electric, and Satoru was trying to ignore the little zings of desire that shot through him every time Suguru moved, or how his arm stretched out along the back of the booth, so close to being draped over Satoru's shoulders.

At the moment, Satoru was regaling them all with the story of some girl who had asked him out, and he hadn't realized that she was asking him out until the fourth(?) attempt when she'd finally gotten exasperated and just demanded are you gay or something?

"What'd you say?" Shoko asked, idly curious but not super invested, spinning her spoon against the bottom of her empty bowl.

"Oh. Just, like, no, I'm just not interested."

"Yeah, same as you've said every time someone has asked you out," Utahime contributed, with a little snort. "More likely you're just ace."

Silence descended around the table, somewhere between shocked and awkward. Satoru stared at her, lips parted, and for a moment he genuinely considered it. Am I asexual?

But then Suguru shifted very slightly, either out of awkwardness or intent to say something, and his arm brushed against the back of Satoru's neck. The bolt of lust that went through him shot straight to his cock. Right. Not asexual.

"I'm not," Satoru insisted, the words spilling indignantly from his mouth before he could think about them. "I have a boyfriend."

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Satoru smiles at the sweet kiss to his nose, and his eyes widen a little in surprise at being called 'baby'. He's always thought that it was a stupid epithet, because why would someone want to compare their romantic partner to a baby? Babies are terrible. All wrinkly and noisy. But when Suguru calls him that now, it makes him feel all flattered and gooey, like he's something treasured.

Breathing out in a puff that's almost a laugh, something awed and aching with emotion, Satoru reaches up to cup Suguru's cheek. "I want you so much, Suguru. You're my favorite person in all the world."

Suguru grins at that, nuzzling his cheek against Satoru's hand. "Yeah?" he asks, teasingly. "I should hope so, considering what we're doing right now."

Not that they've gone that far, but there is the possibility. The potential. Suguru likes sex, and he knows Satoru is a virgin, and Suguru isn't sure how often he jerks off, but he doesn't think Satoru is adverse to sex, considering everything.

"You're my favorite person, too. You were stunningly attractive and then a hilarious jerk, and I fell in love—" He cuts off, blushing. That's not something to confess before they've even gone on a proper date. "I really enjoyed that, and getting to know you, and you became my best friend."

Satoru's eyes flash wide as Suguru accidentally confesses that he fell in love. Lips parted in shock, Satoru stares up at him, heart completely forgetting how to beat in a rhythm for a few seconds, going too fast and skipping a few. "Oh."

He's too stunned to think, too stunned to say anything. Thinking that Suguru liked him enough to date him was unbelievable. Thinking that Suguru is in love with him is wildly, impossibly too good to be true.

One hand's still cupped against Suguru's cheek, and the other curls unthinking around the side of his waist, slipping up under his shirt to press against skin. "You ..."

His breath shudders out of him, a little quiver going through him because no one's ever ...

"Say it," Satoru whispers, realizing that he's started trembling under Suguru. "Say what you meant."

He braces himself for it to be nothing, tries to smother the desperate little flare of hope. Satoru says he loves things all the time. Cake. Glitter. Sea turtles. Finding new flavors of gummy bears. Suguru just meant that he really liked something, but froze up because it was an awkward word to use it context. He didn't ...

He couldn't ...

For all that Suguru dates casually and has had a number of partners, he's never fallen in love with them, far too guarded with his heart to truly connect completely and let someone in. He's honest with them, and his partners have always known that it's never meant to be something serious, which is why he has gone through so many partners. So he's never said those words before, or come as close as he has to saying them to Satoru.

He stares at Satoru for a moment, color still obvious on his cheeks. Satoru's hands against his skin burn, both too cold and too hot. The pulse in Suguru's neck flutters, his heartbeat erratic. The moment stretches between them, tense, as he wonders what this means for them.

"I fell in love," he says softly, what feels like an eternity later.

"Suguru," he whispers, disbelieving. His trembling increases, and he still can't properly form words, even though he knows he should, he should tell Suguru how incredible he is, how special and wanted and loved. But Satoru is utterly choked by emotion, unable to speak even a single word beyond his boyfriend's name.

His arms slide farther around Suguru, hooking around his back and hauling him down into a hug so he can tuck his face into the crook of Suguru's neck. His legs lock around Suguru's hips in return, tangling him up as tightly as he can, clinging desperately to his best friend.

"Suguru," he murmurs again, shaking uncontrollably, breath coming in little gasps. His lashes are wet as he presses his face into Suguru's skin.

Suguru drops his weight on Satoru as his (new) boyfriend tugs him into a hug. He can feel how Satoru shakes, and that was definitely not the reaction he was expecting from Satoru with that slip of the tongue. But despite the lack of response, he's not overly concerned: Satoru is practically a limpet with the way he's wrapped himself around Suguru. If Satoru didn't feel something, he likely wouldn't be holding on so deeply.

"Did I render you speechless, Satoru?" he teases gently, running a hand down Satoru's side. "Turn you into a Pokemon?" Though Pokemon only say their own names, not others.

Satoru gasps, scandalized, at that accusation, unable to help laughing. "How dare you!! I know you're just trying to goad me into an argument. You know Digimon are better."

His grip loosens only a little, and he keeps his face pressed into Suguru's neck, nuzzling softly at him.

"Suguru," he whispers, still trembling. He's overcome by emotion and can't even start shaping it into proper words. But as long as he has Suguru close, he trusts that they'll figure it out in the end. "No one's ever ..."

"But they talk, don't they? More than the one word that Pokémon can say, which was what I'd reduced you to," he points out, tone still lightly teasing. "So you were a Pokémon there for a moment."

He stays like that, resting on top of Satoru, while Satoru adjusts; it's absolutely not a problem for him to snuggle against Satoru, and he knows it's likely still overwhelming. He continues to massage his side, slipping his hand beneath his shirt so he press his fingers against Satoru's skin.

"No one's ever said that to you?" he asks softly. He had long suspected Satoru never dated, and now he has confirmation that the boyfriend is fictional, so yeah, it makes sense that no one ever said that. "I do love you." His cheeks flame as he says it again, still feeling awkward with it despite his years of dating. "Take your time with it. You don't need to figure out everything right now."

Satoru whimpers when Suguru says it again, grip still fiercely possessive. "No one's ever loved me, Suguru," he whispers, still trembling, certain that Suguru doesn't understand the depth of what he means, or how significant it is for Suguru to offer this to him. "Family included."

He presses a few soft kisses along the side of Suguru's neck, over the skin that he's left wet and salted with tears. "I do love you," he whispers, with a devastated little hiccup. "More than I know how to deal with."

That small confession about his family surprises Suguru more than the actual confession of love, and he blinks at Satoru, confused for a moment, before his expression melts into something fierce and protective. He knew Satoru's family was terrible, but to that extent—

He shakes his head, tilting his head so he can kiss Satoru's temple. "You're my family now, and I love you," he whispers. "And my mom likes you even through the phone. She'll probably love you when she meets you." His mom tends to collect strays. He thinks he learned something about love from her. "We'll figure out how to deal with it."

Satoru makes a soft, grateful sound at the kiss, tentatively loosening his grip a little, though he remains shy about meeting Suguru's eyes. "I can't believe someone as incredible as you wants me, Suguru. I've been so hopelessly in love with you."

He kisses along Suguru's jaw, regaining a little of his confidence, then finally brushes their noses together and meets his boyfriend's eyes. His cheeks are deeply flushed, still in awe about his luck with all of this, but he feels more confident with his trust in Suguru. They're still best friends, and Suguru's still his favorite person in the world. None of the best things about their relationship are going to change. They just also now get to kiss.

"This feels nice." Satoru brushes his hand shyly along Suguru's side, up under his shirt. "Feels safe. I like having you on top of me like this."

"Glad I caught you in that lie," Suguru says, grinning at him. "I did want to punch out this guy who was clearly not a good boyfriend, and I was incredibly jealous of the fact that he got to hold you and kiss you and love you. At least I had your friendship, which was something."

Suguru would never admit it, but he would have figured out something if Satoru really had been dating some random guy from Kyoto.

He doesn't think about that, and instead focuses on Satoru, enjoying the feeling of his hand running over his side. "Yeah? Feels good when I'm pressing you down?" He nuzzles Satoru's nose with his, then tilts his head so he can press faint kisses along his jaw. "I like having you under me like this."

"There's no way I would have kept the lie up in any case," Satoru says, blushing and grinning happily back at Suguru. Now that he's no longer feeling such a desperate need to cling, he's starting to become aware of how intimately Suguru is nestled between his legs because of how Satoru hooked them around his hips. Especially as Suguru talks about kissing and love and being jealous.

"Y-yeah." Shivering, Satoru shifts a little under him, aware of his cock hardening again. He'd softened partway due to the intensity of his emotions, the hurt of all those years without believing he would ever be loved, but now that they're back to flirting he can't help but be aroused by Suguru atop him, between his legs. "Feels really safe being pinned down by you. And really hot, um. Having you above me." His cheeks are blazing, but he keeps talking anyway, tipping his head to allow better access for those kisses on his jaw. "Between my legs. Um."

"Yeah?" Suguru asks, smiling against his jaw, nipping at Satoru's chin lightly, and then nosing down the column of his neck, now that Satoru's tilted his head. "Do you like that feeling?"

He can feel Satoru's hardness, bulging of his pants. It's matched by Suguru: hard now, cock straining against his trousers. He can ignore it, he has some modicum of self-control, but as he and Satoru flirt and talk about this, he takes a slight risk, and grinds his hips down against Satoru's. He angles his hips so they're brushing against each other, and it makes him groan against Satoru's neck.

"Tell me if it's too much."

Satoru whimpers and moans at the kisses and bites to his throat, which only causes his shifting and squirming to increase, wriggling beneath his boyfriend. "Yeah. I like everything with you. I want--"

Shuddering at the feeling of Suguru grinding against him, Satoru tightens his arms around Suguru's torso, wanting to keep him close, wanting more. "Not too much. I want more. I want to touch you, feel you."

His hands steal up Suguru's shirt again, pushing it upward and then tugging to try and get it over his head and out of the way. "Teach me how to make you feel good. Please, Suguru. Please."

"You're not going to need much tutoring, if you keep that up," Suguru says, a little breathless, but pleased and happy with the direction things are going. He lets go of Satoru to sit up, straddling Satoru's thighs, and tugs off his shirt, tossing it aside. He tugs at Satoru's shirt too, pushing it up to reveal his stomach. Satoru is unfairly lean and sexy, seemingly without even trying. "Off," he says, simply.

It'll feel better if they're both half-naked and pressed together, he figures. And Satoru doesn't seem like he's hesitant about this, happy to go further, which is great in Suguru's mind. He'll stop wherever Satoru wants, and he doesn't want to pressure him into anything, but he's definitely eager to get his hands on Satoru.

Satoru wiggles beneath him and then arches up, helping to lift his body so they can get the shirt off of him. He barely pays attention to his own shirt, tossing it recklessly to one side so that he can keep his focus on the important of staring hungrily at Suguru's body. He's only ever stolen glances, feeling like he was doing something illicit every time he stashed away a glimpse of Suguru in his memory to be obsessed over. Now he can just look.

"You're so hot, Suguru." The words are breathless, with a hint of a whine at the end. Satoru wants him so much that he feels stupid with it, unable to think or function. He just wants, but he doesn't know what to do about it. His hands reach toward Suguru, fingers quivering slightly as he splays them across the warm skin of Suguru's torso, exploring his musculature and pausing to tease his nipple.

Suguru huffs slightly, amused. "Says the most gorgeous guy I know," he says, leaning forward and dipping his head so he can kiss Satoru again. It's a quick kiss, nothing deep or lingering, especially as Satoru keeps touching him.

The teasing touch to his nipples makes him groans, and he presses into Satoru's hands. "You can be rougher. And touch me however you want, I'll enjoy it." He likes being touched, and this is Satoru; everything is welcome. "And you don't have to rush through it, it's not a sprint. We'll have time to learn things about each other."

Suguru shifts again so he can stretch back over Satoru, legs tangling, and aligning their hips so he can press against Satoru's erection, his own cock fully straining against his pants.

Satoru blushes happily at the flattery, gladly welcoming Suguru down for that kiss. At the invitation to touch rougher, Satoru plucks Suguru's nipple more firmly between his fingers, a playful smirk on his lips as he tests the new reactions he can get to this. "I know. You're mine now and neither of us are going anywhere. I'm just excited."

Rumbling appreciatively at having Suguru's weight pressing him down, Satoru rolls his hips up, grinding their cocks together. His hands slide down Suguru's back, cupping his ass in both hands and squeezing. He grins at the freedom to be able to do this, especially as he grinds up against Suguru at the same time. "Strip the rest of the way, Suguru, please. I wanna see you."

The firmer tug makes him groan and rock down against Satoru again, hips jerking instinctively against his boyfriend's. "And you never have been patient," Suguru murmurs, when he catches his breath, grinning down at him.

"Ah, fuck." A breathless, choked off whisper, almost guttural, because it's all so hot. And for all of his experience, it's still emotional.

Suguru grinds against Satoru, torn between arching into the grip his hands have on his ass, and pressing more firmly against Satoru to savor the feel of his cock. The request helps, in a way, saves him from deciding. He shifts to stand, knowing that would be easier and quicker, and ultimately more sexy than trying to wriggle out of his pants while straddling Satoru.

"You mean you never looked while I was changing?" he teases, as he climbs off the bed to strip out off his pants and underwear, cock springing free, already hard, the tip shiny. "You too, baby. I want to see you." And rather than waiting for Satoru to strip, he reaches for his belt and fly.

"Hm?" Satoru says, slow to respond as he stares. His cheeks flush, jaw hanging open at the sight of Suguru naked for him, the hard and eager length of his cock. "I mean, I stole some glimpses. But I never got to look as much as I wanted. And I've never gotten to see you ... um."

Attention deeply distracted by the way Suguru's cock bobs with every movement, Satoru let Suguru strip him. He lifted his hips as Suguru drew his pants and underwear down, his own cock long but not as girthy as Suguru's, rising from a nest of soft white curls. Feeling immediately shy, Satoru drew his knees up a little, biting his lower lip.

"Never gotten to see me hard?" Suguru finishes for him, teasingly. "I guess it is different hard versus soft. And most of the time, guys try not to look at other guys when changing. We're just as vicious as girls sometimes."

He talks as he strips Satoru, tossing pants and underwear aside, unconcerned despite his usual neatness. How can he care where their clothes are when he wants nothing more than to see Satoru in all his glory, and put his hands and mouth on him as soon as possible?

Once they're both nude, he looks Satoru over, eyes dark with desire as he studies his boyfriend. "Fuck, you're so hot," Suguru says, crawling back on the bed with him and settling between Satoru's legs. He kisses him briefly, then scoots down, letting his fingers slide down Satoru's torso, following that with his lips.

"Not like you have anything to worry about from other guys looking at you," Satoru says, still unable to look away from Suguru's body, especially enrapt by his hard cock and the dark hair framing it. "They can't be anything but jealous. Or horny. Maybe both."

Shy though he is, he parts his thighs for Suguru, curling his legs loosely around Suguru's waist in order to keep him close but without obstructing his movements. He has some idea where this is going, and he finds his words completely choked up, too flustered to say anything at all but trusting that he's in good hands with Suguru.

"I was a little more restrained in high school. Didn't want to cause problems or anything. But no, I didn't worry too much then." He grins up at Satoru. "You don't have anything to worry about, either. Unless you were worried about beating people off because you're too gorgeous for them."

Suguru is torn about what to do. He wants to do everything: keep kissing Satoru, and kiss him everywhere, and touch him everywhere, and suck his cock, and grind against him, and fuck him. There's time, they'll get to all of that, but the intense desire is overwhelming. Makes it difficult to figure out a direction.

He dips his head again to kiss Satoru's stomach, lips gliding down and nuzzling at random spots. "I'm gonna suck you off," he says, figuring it's easier to start with that. He can explore more later.

Satoru knew that he was physically stunning, so he didn't argue about that. (He was perfectly aware that it was his personality flaws that were the problem, and he remained plenty insecure about those getting in the way of the things he wanted or causing people to reject him.)

His cock gave an eager jump at Suguru's statement, dribbling another little gush of precum. Lips parted in awe as he watches Suguru, Satoru whimpers softly, cheeks flushed, then nods. "Okay," he whispers. His skin tingles along his shoulder blades and down his spine. This seems too good to be true. He shouldn't be this fortunate, this favored.

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